.What If.

I have been pretty transparent on here with the fact that fear of man, of failure, and other things are sin issues in my life. Perhaps that is why this quote sucker punched me. I saw it on Pinterest a few weeks back, and have not been able to stop thinking about it.

Oh my, there are so many things. Which proves to me just how deep this sin issue is in my life.

I think what I would first do is write that book that has been brewing in my heart.

Then perhaps I would start that evening Bible study that keeps flip - flopping through my mind.

I would start an orphan care program in our church.

I would boldly share the gospel with my neighbor.

I would open my home to a lot of hurting children.

And the thing that I need to grasp is the fact that the Spirit is living in me, and when following Him I can't fail.

What would you attempt to do if you could not fail??

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7


PS Thank you for the encouragement and support with yesterday's announcement. In true form, I was fearful to go public with it. Please continue to pray for my Cadi - she feels so tired today and is running a low grade fever and my grandma who continues to be in the hospital. Thank you. I simply have the best readers/friends, and I am so grateful for every one of you who takes the time to read here.

.Seeing God in my Dryer.

Jim came home from helping our best friends out on Saturday. He told me that their parents were getting a new dryer and were going to give us their old one. "Oh nice." I said.

In my head I was screaming.

God, what are you doing?! We were just given a dryer a few months ago. Yes, it is old, and yes it makes a horrible screeching noise, but it works. I really would rather you provided us with groceries this week. After all, this is our tightest week of the month with most of our big bills due!


Jim and I have been praying that God would provide for our needs this month. We have also been praying that as impossible as it seems we would be able to survive this month of February sans paychecks without using any of our emergency fund that we set up when we started our Dave Ramsey plan. It's a huge thing to ask, but we serve a huge God. I was really hopeful....until Saturday.

I haven't been feeling well all weekend and Scotty woke up with a really yucky runny nose on Sunday, so I decided to keep him home from church. After Jim and Cadi left for Sunday School and Scotty went down for his nap, I decided to throw a load of laundry in. After about ten minutes of a load tumbling in the dryer I hear a really loud shrill noise coming from the dryer and then it stops. After several repeated attempts to get it working I gave up, and then I was overcome with the realization of what had happened - God had provided for our needs. Our dryer was broken, and He provided before we even knew it was a need! In that moment I could almost hear His gentle discipline.

Oh, daughter, your faith is so small. Why would you ever doubt My love for you? My ways are higher than your ways. Trust in Me with all of your heart, and don't lean on your own understanding. All you have to do is look around. You should have seen me in your dryer - of course I will provide for you. You just need to open your eyes and humble your heart.

The groceries seem a little less significant now. It would have been much harder for us to scrape together money for a dryer this month than it will be for us to scrape together some inexpensive meals. I am humbled.

Where have you seen God lately? Sometimes He can be seen in the most unpredictable ways.

"Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you." I Peter 5:7

(This is the second time recently that God has used a dryer to teach me a lesson! Ashamedly the lesson was very much the same. I think I've got it this time. To read about my other lesson click here.)

.Starting to Connect Some Dots.

It is taking me much longer to share our story than I anticipated it would. Part of the reason is because we are still so caught up inside of the story. Every time I sit down and reflect on the past chapters of our life I am overcome and overwhelmed with the intricate way God has weaved the details together. I am also ashamed for the many times that I did not notice or perceive it to be that way. I want this chapter to be different. This chapter that I am living right now is so exciting and scary, but I want to truly see God in the details, for He is right here in the middle weaving and weaving the tapestry of our life. It has been painful and uncomfortable, but stepping back and looking inside it is breath- takingly beautiful. I am so humbled that He has chosen Jim and I for this journey. We are so undeserving.

I know that I have gathered new readers since even the last installment of our faith story, and I do not want to leave you behind. God is urging me to write this for a reason. For my own good specifically, but I also strongly desire for other women to connect with our story - to see, maybe for the first time God weaving her own story. I am not a public speaker. I am not good with the spoken word. My tongue gets twisted and tied. My thoughts a jumble. Yes, if asked, I would stand up and give this testimony of God's goodness; how could I not? But this here, my written words from my heart, is my true platform. This is where God has gifted me, and is where I would much rather share. My prayer is that through these posts about our story, your heart would be touched, pricked, and you would see the God of all creation in a light that maybe you have never seen Him before. To God be the glory; great things He has done! To catch up on our story click on the following links:

Once Upon a Time
Our Total Money Makeover
I Don't Know How the Story Ends
At This Point in Time
Letting it All Hang Out
Our Faith Story:Part Six
God Alone
Bitter Sweet
One Month Under Our Belts

I felt as if I had been sucker-punched when Jim walked into my classroom, where I taught second graders, that day and told me that he had been laid-off. I was furious. I felt betrayed by the people Jim worked for, and I felt betrayed by God. I also became introspective, and began to wonder if it had not been God's plan for us to move back near our family homes and pursue the ministry of camp, but if it had been my plan - my manipulating Jim to get us where I wanted to be. If I was being completely honest with myself, which I seldom was back then, it wasn't really camp ministry I desired - rather it was a desire to be close to my family and camp ministry was merely the vehicle to get us where I wanted us. After all I had been the one to put the bird in Jim's ear about pursuing an internship at the camp in the first place. We were visiting my parents one weekend, and the desire was as strong as it ever was to move back. My head starting thinking and my tongue started manipulating.

Jim don't you want to get out of this dead-end job that you're in and start ministry? After all that is what you went to Bible college for. I wonder if camp has already chosen their next intern. You have always loved camp. I bet that would be a perfect fit. Why don't you call and see if you can get an interview?

Jim called that day and got the position very soon after. We prayed about it a bit, but looking back it was truly less of God's leading and more of mine. I am not saying God was not in control - He was, and this was part of His intended story for us. It's a fine line, and it is hard to explain accurately.

I had never really been very independent. I moved just three hours away to college, and I enjoyed that. But I always really liked being at home with my family. That has not changed today. I would still rather be at home with my family than be any place else in the world, and while that is not always a bad thing God has had to gently stretch me in this area. Now I am getting ahead of myself, though.

I remember that day so well. Jim closed the door to my classroom and held me while I sobbed. I liked to be in control. I had felt safe knowing that Jim would still have his job at the running store until it was time for us to move. All of my plans had been so perfectly laid out. This was not in my plans. I had expected Jim would stay at the running store until the day we moved. I remember moping around for a few days. I watched Jim search out the job listings in the paper. I was miserable. Who would hire Jim for a few short months?

In a matter of days God stepped into the equation and provided in such a way that I am still in awe when I think back. I cannot remember the details. I need to go back to my journal entries from that time and look it up, but the details are not pertinent to the story. Somehow Jim found out about a local publishing company that was looking to hire a person to beef up their website design. Remember how my husband had begun learning a bit about that at his running job?

God was weaving.

Jim was immediately hired, and his boss knew it would be temporary - that was all he wanted and needed! I believe Jim was hired under the impression that he knew a lot about web design and Photoshop. {grin} Fortunately my husband is a very quick learner, especially when it comes to things of this nature. He was also still very friendly with the man back at the running center who had been teaching him little things about web design. With that man's gracious help in answering any of Jim's questions and Jim's quick wit, he went from knowing very little about web-design to being able to completely build a website mostly from scratch. He also got very articulate with Photoshop.

Jim so enjoyed those few months of that job. In ways he had been beaten down at his other job, he was lifted up here. God was so gracious during this time. I even believe Jim brought home a bigger paycheck from this job! Oh how God was reaching out and loving us in ways I barely noticed until now. Jim was able to completely makeover the publishing company's website, and he learned how to do some graphic designing of some of their paper advertisements as well. He loved the creativity of the job and excelled at it.

I continued teaching and we started packing up our little apartment, anticipating the next phase of our life. Jim continued to preach at the little home church. They begged us to stay on and for Jim to become their pastor. It wasn't time yet, though. We were not ready. We still had so very much to learn.

At the end of May, with no permanent housing, we moved all of our possessions and settled into life at camp, living in a tiny cabin. We really had no idea what to expect. We were scared and excited, in very much the same place I find myself today. But God was at work....

weaving

weaving

weaving.

Jim's very first big assignment at camp was to design and print a brochure advertising the summer weeks ahead.

Would you know anything about that? The camp director asked Jim. We'd like to save a little money this year and try to design the brochure in-house. I wasn't sure if this was something you would be able to do or not.

Oh. So this was part of the reason God allowed Jim to lose his job.


We were starting to connect some dots.

.One Month Under Our Belts.

I wrote here about starting our Total Money Makeover via Dave Ramsey last month. Little did we know that just after beginning the makeover and just after cutting up all of our credit cards and vowing to never go into ANY kind of debt again, God would ask us to step up our faith a notch farther. We learned a few days after starting this money journey that Jim's last day at camp would be January 31st, rather than this spring like we had originally been thinking. So that means Jim's last paycheck came last Wednesday. I have had moments of panic and wishful thinking regarding those silly plastic cards, but overall I am at complete peace. Thankfully because of starting the makeover last month, we were very frugal with our money for the whole month of January. We stuck with our budget plan for the month, and we were very faithful in allocating our money each week before spending it. It has worked beautifully for us. We even came under budget in a couple areas! So we start this month of February a little differently. According to Dave Ramsey's plan we should start snowballing debt this month, but we cannot do that with our current financial status. Rather we are just trying to survive the month! We sat down a few weeks ago and figured out if we could make it work to not get paychecks for February (Jim does not get voted on at our church until the last week in February), and while money will be very tight and stretched and we will need to figure out how to go without some things, we can do it! I am excited to see how God provides in a few areas, as we have already had a few expenses come up that we had not planned for - doesn't that always happen?

I just cannot get over the way God has been growing me since October when He made clear to us His desire for our family to leave the ministry at camp. I never could have imagined trying to go a month without any pay - that seems way too crazy, scary, unstable, etc. I am the person that likes everything planned to a fault. And God has taken all of my plans torn them to shreds and then asked me to trust His plan while wearing a blindfold! But here is where God has placed us, and I am surprisingly calm and dare I say - excited?! God is so good and so faithful. When we finally come out on the other side of our faith story I am going to be such a different person. God has been at work. Looking back over even these past few months, I can see that so much that has happened needed to happen to get me to this place. So with one month under us in this makeover, we step into month number two and we continue to pursue our Savior and stand in awe at His providential care!


My sweet family. I caught Jim snuggling with our children this morning before breakfast, and I just had to preserve the memory. Cadi and Jim still have sleepy eyes, and Scotty just looks completely perplexed. Sweet though.

I am kind of excited about mornings this month. I anticipate that they will be slow and easy as Jim will not be rushing to be at camp, and I will not be rushing to get his lunch together and such. I am planning to enjoy these moments. I think God is being especially gracious to us in giving us this family time before we jump into whatever ministry He has planned for us next. We are not taking this for granted at all.

Cadi is adjusting well to her glasses. She did not care for wearing her patch this morning, but I do hope she will get used to it. I am sleeping a bit better than I had been. I feel tired during the day, and I struggle to fall asleep at night still. However, once I do fall asleep I have been able to stay asleep, that is a huge blessing. Thank you dear readers for your kind and encouraging comments and emails. I am just blown away. I was chatting with a friend today and she remarked over the number of readers my blog has attracted. I am completely perplexed, but I have truly been blessed by the kindness of strangers. And honestly some of my faithful readers are feeling less and less like strangers and more like friends. The body of Christ is such a wonderful thing. I continue to write what is on my heart and to record these cherished moments for myself. I do not want to lose focus of my reason for blogging - to remember these fleeting moments of mommyhood, but having people enjoy or be encouraged by reading my ramblings is certainly the cherry on top. Thank you.

Edit: I just realized this was my hundredth post! How fun. {grin}

.Bitter Sweet.

Today we drove onto the campground for the very last time in the capacity of program director. We drove off the campground about six hours later, just another couple leaving camp.

But we aren't really just another couple leaving camp.

We are a couple who have gone through life change because of the way God has used that camp. We are a couple forever changed because of that camp. We are a very different couple than the one that drove onto that camp in the capacity of program director nearly six years ago.

And now it's over.

I'm still processing.

.Our Faith Story Continued.

I need to continue our story. God keeps prodding me. I think He wants me to see clearly how in the past He was there in uncertain times, and this time is no different. How easily I forget. This has been a rough week for me. I have been battling a lot of fear and doubt and even anger. I have confessed it to God and to my husband. It's still a battle and a constant need for surrender on my part.

For new readers, my husband and I have been led out of our current ministry at a Christian childrens' camp, and into pursuing a pastorate. Jim was the Program Director of the camp, and we have been with them for over five years. This is a huge step of faith for us, as Jim's last day at camp is January 31st, and we have absolutely nothing that is certain for us to jump into after his position at camp ends.

If you are interested in catching up on our story click on the following links:
Once Upon A Time
Our Total Money Makeover
I Don't know how the Story Ends
At This Point in Time
Letting it All Hang Out

.....Here we were two Bible college graduates. One lacking a heart for people, and one being too concerned about what others might think to take the time and effort to truly care about people, and we thought we were ready for ministry.

God had other plans and other chapters to write. Our story had just begun.

We got married the summer before Jim's senior year of college. Jim worked two jobs and went to school. He worked as a truck loader at UPS, and then in the call center for a running company. I also worked in the call center of the running company until January, when I was hired to take over teaching a second grade class in a small Christian school. The former teacher was leaving to have her baby. I hated most every minute of working at the running company. For one thing I hate talking on the phone. Partly because I have a very little voice that sounds young. (I get phone calls from telemarketers asking to speak to my mommy!) So I would feel dumb answering the phone for a company and having the customers think I was 12 or something. I am not confrontational, and I hated the really nasty, mean customers - they gave me belly aches. Plus (at the time) I did not know anything about running! I liked some of the people I worked with, though. Some of them were a bit "rough around the edges", but they all liked me for reasons beyond me. I can see clearly now how God used this short time to help me to learn how to develop relationships with people very different from myself. However, needless to say, I was much happier when I was finished with that job and got into a classroom.

Jim, although he didn't love the job either, excelled, and quickly moved up to a catalog manager. He was able to leave UPS and solely work at the running company. He even learned a little bit from the web design guy about website building and designing, and enjoyed playing with what he learned in his free time. We would shortly see this as the hand of God in Jim's life, even though we had no idea at the time. During the two years that we were there (we stuck around one more year after Jim graduated) we also attended the church associated with the school I worked at. We really loved it at first. We loved the young married couples Sunday School class and small group. We learned so much through it. After about a year of attending we were approached to take on some leadership positions within the Sunday School class and the small groups. We were excited. This would be our first ministry as husband and wife! However, after only a few months involved in leadership things went sour. I am not here to condemn the church or the ministry, and still value many of the things we gained, so I will not go into details. We were hurt, though, and quickly stepped out of leadership. We even struggled with attending church for a bit. We knew this was wrong, and we sought God's guidance as to what to do. Technically, we were required to attend that church since I taught at the school there, but we were able to work around that with the school board.

One day while speaking with Jim's Mom on the phone, we learned of a home church that was just starting up about 45 minutes from where we were living. They were looking for a interim type pastor. Jim and I were intrigued. We met with the founders and fell in love with the sweet older couple, and the feeling was mutual. They had turned a garage on their property into a little church building. We were invited to join them on Sundays, and after attending a few weeks, Jim was invited to preach. This church was like nothing we have ever been a part of before. It was small for one thing - only a handful of families, but it was so authentic and the people were so loving and kind and welcoming. Jim and another college guy were chosen to rotate Sundays preaching. Jim gained excellent experience preparing and preaching sermons, and being completely involved in "doing" church. He was starting to see the pastorate as more than just preaching, but rather as the relational "thing" that God intended it to be. While we loved this little church and the people of that church dearly, we also longed to move closer to family.

By now Jim really was not enjoying his job at the running store, the politics had gotten bad, and some very questionable things were going on in the management - which was run by Christians. Plus we just had such a burden to jump into ministry. We didn't think we were ready for the pastorate yet, though. Through praying about this desire, God brought to mind that Christian camp that we had both worked at and met at. We learned of an internship position opening, and we jumped on it. This meant we could move closer to our families! After applying for the position and accepting the position, Jim told the owner of the running store that he would be leaving in three months to pursue ministry. The owner congratulated Jim and assured him that he could work up until the day he needed to move. We were so relieved that God was allowing everything to work out!

Some time later, Jim got called in for a meeting and was told that the company was going through a financial crisis, and that he was being laid off. We were devastated; especially after having the owner's word. We could not pay our bills based on my salary as a Christian school teacher alone, and who would hire Jim for just three months?

What was ahead could only have been orchestrated by the hand of God. Looking back His fingerprints are all over this story, and I cannot believe I ever doubted Him. Yet here I sit today having to push many of the same doubts out of my mind. Oh, how quickly I forget.

More to come.

.Letting it All Hang Out.

Not really a good day.

Just being honest.

Battling a lot of fear today. Fear of the unknown.

Just wanting an answer for our lives. Just wanting to know, will we be packing up our home? Will we be moving? Should I just wait to put away the Christmas decor, and do it with the other packing if we do move??

I don't feel like relying on God, on waiting for His time. I want answers, now.

Trying to be strong and positive,

for my husband,

my children,

my friends,

my parents (my mom came crying through the door this morning saying she could not even imagine us moving away {gulp}).

I don't feel like being positive, encouraging, or faithful today. I want to curl up in bed with the covers pulled tightly over my head and cry like a baby.

As worried and anxious as I am, I HATE, HATE, HATE seeing those I love worried or anxious.

I can NOT handle this today.

I can not, not, not.

BUT HE can, He will carry me through today and the next and the next.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." I Peter 5:7

Drying my eyes, picking my chin up, and laying this at His feet. Again.

.Tag, I'm It.

My bloggy friend Ramee tagged me to share seven things about myself, and then to pass it on to seven other people. So here it goes....

1. I don't like to drive. I live in a little hick-town and can manage to drive around here, but anything more than that sends me into a state of panic. Literally. My whole body tenses so much that when I am finished driving my shoulders ache. I had to drive "into the city" a few times alone for OB appointments when pregnant with Scotty. I always got to the doctor's office, a sweaty, panicky mess with elevated blood pressure! It is a big fear that I really hope to get over someday soon.

2. I cannot sing to save my life, and it is torture. I love music and all things musical, and feel trapped in this non-singing body!

3. I have gained ten pounds since moving home from camp this summer. And it shows. A lot of it is do to the stress surrounding our life right now. A lot of it is do to laziness and a lack of discipline that I allowed to creep in. My treadmill is going to get a beating today while the children nap. Really. Hold me to it.

4. I thought I was pregnant over Thanksgiving. I wasn't and am not. I am still a little sad, but I realize that it is probably for the best with so much of our life up-in-the-air.

5. Sometimes right before I go to bed at night, when I check on and pray over the children, I sneak Scotty out of his crib and hold him close. He snuggles into my neck, and I breathe in his scent and memorize those moments. I know they are fleeting, and want to cherish them. Fortunately when I lay him back down he goes right back to sleep. No harm done, right?!

6. I wish Jim and I had not gone on a honeymoon. The whole time we were gone, all I wanted to do was settle in our home and life together, and see what it felt like to live normally as husband and wife. Now that we have been married almost eight years, I want to see what it would be like to escape normal life and enjoy a honeymoon!

7. I used to care a lot about what people thought of me. I am working on that with God's help. That is part of the reason I decided to pierce my nose this summer. Not as a rebellion thing - goodness knows I am waaay too old for that, but it was a way to put what I am learning to practice. I know kind of a weird way, but it's the truth.

Wow, I feel like maybe I was a little too honest with some of these! Eek, but I am trying to be more authentic,so I will publish this. But first the seven people I pass this along to are
1. My sis.
2. Bethany
3. Gina
4. Carrie
5. Jenn
6. Joy
7. Liz

Have fun ladies! And if I didn't tag you why don't you share some things here in my comments? I would love to read them! {grin}

.Thankful for broken dryers and spilled soup.

The heart is deceitful above all things,
and desperately sick;
who can understand it?
Jeremiah 17:9

My heart has been both of these things this week.

Deceitful.

Sick.

I haven't been inviting the glorious into the mundane.
My heart deceived me into feeling deep pity for myself for having to do a week's worth of laundry plus our regular daily laundry the past two days.

Our heating element on our dryer broke last week.

Our dryer that was given to us by my dad's cousin when we moved into our first home almost three years ago - because we did not and had not ever owned a dryer.

Our dryer that we did not pay one penny for.

I prayed fervently that God would provide us with a new one last week. I trusted that God would provide. I had seen Him provide in marvelous ways before.

I searched Craigslist and our Pennysaver, and I found some REALLY nice dryers for some reasonable prices. I desperately wanted a nice dryer. {Not an old one.}
And I wanted a gas dryer. (We have the hook up for both.)
I wanted a gas dryer just because I think I like them more. {grin}

Our pennies are pinched at the moment, and even the reasonable prices were seeming not-so-reasonable right now. Then Jim remembered how a man from our church had a dryer that he wanted to give away. {gulp} It is humbling to have to call and beg off a dryer - even if it had been offered.

Jim set everything up and lined up our good friend to help him move it in Monday night.

Monday night.
After dinner.
Before the children were tucked in bed.
{sigh}

I grumbled in my heart.

I grumbled under my breath, too.
I was tired. I had just spent the day caring for my children, schooling Cadi, baking bread, cooking dinner, cleaning the house {trying} to find the glorious in the mundane. But not succeeding. At. all.

Jim and our friend came with the dryer, and it took a {long} time to switch out the old and hook up the new. Which happened to be more old than new. And not a gas dryer.

I grumbled in my heart.
When going to bed that night I {finally} remembered to breathe a prayer of thanks for our new dryer.

But then my heart deceived me and was sick as I thought about the mountain of laundry in our master bathroom, the children's bathroom, and the children's rooms.

And the next morning I began and continued the monotonous and time consuming process of sorting colors, treating stains, washing and drying, folding and sorting again, and putting away clothes.

And I grumbled in my heart.

My heart deceived me into snapping at my precious children yesterday, after a busy morning at the library and a chaotic few moments of remembering to quickly pull together a soup for the crockpot, before it was too late, and all that laundry. I rushed through Cadi's schooling not enjoying a single moment. I rushed through the children's lunch and did not enjoy their sweet chattering. I read them stories, and all the while my heart still grumbled.

I spilled soup all over my floor.

I grumbled in my heart.

My bread maker broke.

I grumbled in my heart.

Jim got rear ended.

I grumbled in my heart. (And over the phone to him.)

I spent two hours working on a project that I volunteered to do for my dad, and all the while I grumbled in my heart.

The whole time I was grumbling, my washer and dryer were dully humming in the background, my sweet children were healthy and secure, my couches were filled with clean laundry and outfits upon outfits for the four of us, my refrigerator was stocked, my soup was cooked to perfection - save a bit on the floor, {grin}, my home was warm and cozy, my body was functioning as it should, my marriage was strong,my husband was protected while on the road away from us, and my eternity was and is secure.

Today I awoke, humbled and I realized all of these things, and I was ashamed. My heavenly Father had provided and cared for so many needs {and wants} just as He promises to do. Just as He always does for me - day in and day out. Even when my heart is deceitful and sick. My heart twisted the blessings that God had so freely poured upon me so much so that I saw them only as curses.

I hope tomorrow that I can see the blessings and reflect God's generous love for me to those around me.

I hope next time I will be thankful for broken dryers and spilled soup.

.I should be doing other things.

I sit at my computer with a mental checklist of things to do a mile long. Those window treatments I mentioned a few posts back still need to be sewn, I have over 100 photos from my last shoot that need to be edited, I have a Bible study to work through, dishes to be washed, floors to be cleaned, books to read, recipes to organize, and the list goes on. But here I sit.
God is doing some crazy things in our life right now. Things I cannot share at this moment. Things that make me scared out of my mind and question. And it is amazing how these "things" have tilted my world and brought it to a screeching hault. I told my best friend that now is when I need to put feet to my faith, and I fear I may fail. Scary.
Have you ever tried to go about your normal daily tasks with the weight of the world on your shoulders? It's kind of hard. I will be teaching my Cadi letters and sounds one moment and the next my mind is so entwined and wrapped up in these matters that I myself am forgetting what sound 'u' makes. It's disconcerting, but at the same time it is really refreshing to be in this constant communication with God. To breathe His name and seek His wisdom, help, and peace constantly - for really there is nothing left to do.
I have been pouring over the Scriptures searching for wisdom and answers and peace. I feel as if I cannot trust my heart, and I am trying to discern the Spirit's leading in the muddiness of my thoughts. Scripture is a big help in allowing me to hear "the voice of Truth". So I cling to that and to my God who holds the future. What do you cling to when your heart is anxious and unsure?
It is a strange season for our family. I covet your prayers.

"The Voice of Truth"

Oh,what I would do to have
the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

But the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
The Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
And the Voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the Voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the Voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are the Voice of truth