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Thursday, April 22, 2010

.Preserving their Innocence.

I have been thinking a lot lately about preserving my children's innocence. Now I do not want to get into a deep theological debate here, so let me be clear with that statement. Yes, I believe that my children were born into this world with a sin nature. No, I am not claiming that they are innocent in that sense. I am referring more to innocence in the way of "unknowing".

I talked a little bit about media here. I didn't delve into specifics too much, though. So today I am going to. Because I don't know about you, but as a mommy to two children, I am fed up with it.

I have to be honest with you first. In the post mentioned above, I said that we were cancelling our cable. That is where we were getting the funds to sponsor Gerlie - our child through Compassion International. Well, to make a very long story short - we didn't cancel. Our phone and internet are included in our cable package. We found out that if we canceled cable, we would have actually been paying more - ridiculous. We are sponsoring Gerlie. This was our second month supporting her. We have had no trouble accruing the funds to send to her - praise God! Cadi thinks that we do not have cable. We have not told her otherwise. So the children never watch it. I never turn it on during the day, and I seldom ever have. I would prefer to spend any down time another way. Anyway, I just wanted to get that out in the open.

Back to media.

Back to preserving my children's innocence - keeping them pure.

I am just struggling with knowing how to raise these two precious children in such a media driven, perverse world. Have you seen the immodest clothing that is already being pushed on our little girls? My husband is very sensitive about what our daughter wears, and I am so thankful for his wisdom and discernment in this area. I wasn't always so thankful. I didn't understand what we were up against at first. I remember when Cadi was a baby thinking that the itty bitty baby bikinis were so adorable, but Jim would not allow that on his daughter. I thought it was harmless and cute. However when I stopped to really think about it, I knew he was right. A bikini has been a sex symbol for years. We would not allow our teenage daughter to dress in a bikini, so why would we let our infant daughter, or toddler, or preschooler? And if you do allow your little girl to wear a bikini, I am not judging you, this is what we do in our family to preserve innocence.

It goes beyond clothing even. It seems as if the world/media is pushing our daughters to grow up faster and faster. Have you noticed? Have you seen the movies, the TV shows, the music pushed on our little girls? What is the harm? What gets sacrificed? Our children's childhood!! That is huge. I want to preserve my daughter's (and my son's) childhood for as long as I can. They only get it once. Why not make it long and sunny? (I have a whole post on this drafted up for Raising Homemakers. I will let you know when it publishes.)

I want to preserve Scotty's innocence by keeping him away from the images of scantily clad women that our culture is saturated in. So at 20 months he doesn't watch cable. But what do I do in "the real world"? I saw on The Duggar's show one time where they had a code word for the boys/men when out in public. If the women/girls saw another female dressed immodestly they would say this word, immediately the males would look at their feet and keep walking until they were told all is clear. Sounds a little extreme. Or does it? I am still mulling this over. I have a friend that does this with her son and husband.

What bothers me the most is the way we, as Christians, have been brain washed into thinking this loss of innocence is just normal and going to happen. That immodest clothing for little girls is cute, that inappropriate movies are funny, that sex education needs to be taught far too early, because we want them to hear it from us first etc. I have fallen prey to it before myself. But I am choosing to be more aware, to put my guard up, and to protect these children in my care. I am not going to concede to our society. I am not.

I believe that I have a God-given role in the life of my children to preserve their innocence. I am still working out exactly how. I do not want my children to be defenseless in our culture, but the Bible also tells me to dwell on what is pure, true, lovely.

Philippians4:8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.


I think my children's childhood should mirror this. The gift of innocence is a beautiful thing I can give to my children.

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I do not want to stir up controversy, but I would love some discussion.
What do you do to preserve innocence in your children?
Have you thought about it before?




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39 comments:

sarahmae said...

Excellent article!

I am SO thankful you have joined on as a RH contributor! Can't wait for the launch in June!

:)

jamers said...

Wow! What a wonderfully written post that speaks right to my heart. I am passionate about keeping my girls little girls as long as I can. I never did the Disney mania beyond Winnie the Pooh! :) We are very cautious at what they wear and now that they are 12 and 9, I am so thankful that we had those standards set in place before they started changing...I think that is the best way to say that. ;) I challenge you to keep your feet on the path you have laid before you now. It gets tough. Peer pressure really is hard and I see what they girls want to wear at times but we have been blessed with finding great solutions to those problems and we also have had to take some "influences" out of their life including people when necessary. that is always tough. Can't wait to hear what others have to say! :)

Sheri said...

This completely reflects how I have struggled with my two boys. For years we did not have cable, until it made sense economically to bundle everything together, like you. But until my kids were about 9 years old, the only TV they watched was PBS. Even now, we are more strict about what they watch than many parents, and I constantly worry about what they see when they are at other people's homes. When we watch shows as a family, we have to turn off commercials, because many are completely inappropriate!

Unfortunately, I think we are in te minority, mainly because society has "taught" us to think that it is okay to be bombarded with sexual images on TV and in print. I really believe that is one of the reason kids are growing up way too fast these days.

I don't have any answers, and I'm sure I will continue to struggle with this. Good luck to you and your husband as you go through this too.

Theresa said...

Excellent post, Tiffany! Kudos for speaking your convictions!

It does seem impossible at times to shield them. As I flip through the channels, hear music on the radio, look at books at the library, observe other kids or walk through the store aisles I find my main line being - "Not in our family." As the girls get older, establishing our family standard as one that is pleasing to God can seem like quite a chore at times.
Running the risk of sounding like a boyscout, it's my job as Mommy to protect and prepare the kiddos. As much as I want to hide them away from the impurities of life, I know I also need to teach them to deal with them and why these things aren't beneficial or God honoring.

And that is my ramble of the day. I'm sure I'll come up with more later ;)

Melissa said...

I agree completely. My husband and I have had many a discussion on this topic... No one else is going to fight for our child's innocence. WE, their parents, have to be willing to fight for it.

We have all but unplugged our TV. I'm so glad. We've never had cable anyway, but even the stuff on the few channels we do get through our antenna isn't anything to cheer about... I want my children wise to what is good and to be simple concerning evil as Paul says in Romans 16:19. I remember being teased about my 'innocence' growing up in public school. Thankfully it wasn't mean spirited teasing, but being innocent definitely wasn't the norm. Innocence is viewed as a negative thing these days. People think they need to raise their children to be worldly-wise so they can 'survive' in the world... Well first of all, as Christians, we are called to live in the world, but not live like the world... secondly, the wisdom that God desires to give us and guide us with is first and foremost PURE (John 3:17)

Ok... so off my little soap box. Ha! Now that I've written a book in this comment, I need to get off this computer and go do something fun with my boys! Have a great day, Tiffany, thanks for your encouraging words as usual!

Mandolin said...

Like you...this is something that didn't come to the forefront of my mind until the birth of my daughter. Tho, I was raised to be SUPER modest as a child and teen... everything changes even more with children, doesnt it?!
I appreciate and value this post. Keep it coming! We HAVE to fight for our children - our future! Just the other day I was walking through target and couldn't believe some of the things I was seeing in the BABY section...
People tease me now because I'm kind of a fanatic about
1) no spaghetti straps or mini-skirts for Ava
2) no baby bikinis
3) very limited TV
But ultimately, we answer to our GOD not to man. He is the righteous Judge and lover of our souls...and the souls of our children. (Lord willing...)
Thanks for sharing and being open and honest. So many of us agree, and we need each other to fight this fight!

**also, dont you HATE how its more to have just internet...? me too.

My Heart said...

This is great! Fantastic even! We have had strong convictions about this for many years now.

3 years ago we got rid of our cable. Too much junk on it and, if you did happen to find something worthwhile on, the commercials that bombarded you were worse than some shows on tv. Or the commercials geared to the children, what do they do? Instill in our children a sense of greed and materialism and that the only thing that will make them happy is {insert latest toy gimmick here.}

I live in a small city and it is almost impossible to find appropriate clothing for my daughter to wear. She is almost 10 so 95% of the clothes are revealing, too short, too *ahem* mature, shall we say.

When did it become ok to dress our children like this? I heard a lady speaking with her 3 year old daughter at a children's function. While there was music playing she said to this 3 year old girl "Shake your money maker." Pardon me?

The shows that are geared to our pre-teen children are about boy crazy girls and girl crazy boys and dating and hand holding and kissing and it has to STOP! A 10 year old should not be worrying about a boyfriend!

Sorry, you seem to have struck a chord that resonates deep within my spirit. {grin}I will back away slowly before someone gets hurt. {sheepsih grin}.

Great job on this post. As you were...

*graceful exit*

Sarah said...

*clap clap clap clap clap*

I agree!

FWIW on the cable, we cancelled ours and kept our internet, but also cancelled our home phone and just use our cells. The "kept" us longer than we intended by the price though -- maddening!

Regarding the meat of your post... it's such a HARD road to toe -- but worth it, I believe. I do, however, think we need to be very congnisant of how we're teaching it to our children. You were very good to point out in your post that these were choices that YOUR family is making and that you're not judging others. However, when we teach it to our children, I think we must be careful to teach them in the same vein so that we don't inadvertantly teach them to judge others.

I say that not at all as an "expert" -- but rather as one who struggles with judging as a result of the "restrictions" placed on me. In hindsight, I'm so very thankful for the restrictions (though I hated them at the time) -- but I still struggle with not judging others who choose to follow other choices.

Grace is such an incredible gift. I need to do a better job of extending it to others sometimes.

Kudos to you for this post and for the choices your making. Innocence is certainly not easily preserved.

Liz @ Sugarplum Creations said...

Amen! We are a homeschooling family for some of these very reasons. Mostly to preserve our childrens' innocence. I am just now becoming more aware of clothing issues. As in, I was one of those moms whose infant daughter wore a two piece swimsuit, and I thought the little baby tummy was adorable. Now that two of mine are a little older {7 and 5} it is one piece bathing suits {or two pieces but they look like a one piece, does that make sense?}, and we are very limited as to where we shop for clothing for them, because I have such a hard time finding "little girl clothing" for my LITTLE GIRLS. As for TV, we do have cable, but the TV is rarely on at our house. At 7 years old, my oldest is still pretty much limited to watching Noggin, and some documentaries {she loves Earth and Under the Sea} Oh, and she loves The Duggars, so we watch that every Tuesday night together.

All that to say that I have changed a lot in the last few years. I, honestly, never thought a lot about modesty and such issues {in fact, I'm embarassed to say that I was quite immodest as a young adult, and even competed at the Miss USA pageant. In a bikini. On stage. Yeah, not a *proud* moment, but I've grown ;)}

Thanks so much for bringing this up, Tiffany. I really look forward to hearing more from you on this.

Hugs ♥
Liz

Chrissy said...

I agree wholeheartedly about the bikini. It is so hard to find a one piece for a 3-year-old...and how ridiculous is that?!

Oh, and I agree with the rest, too! :o)

Tammy said...

I agree! I struggle with finding a balance. As a kid, my parents went overboard - I always felt like the weird one in a group. So I want my child to feel normal, but I still want modesty. So I pay more money to find things that are fashionable but still "cool". Speedo makes some modest one-piece suits.

As for the reader who said she can't find modest skirts - I've cut off jeans of my son's and sewn ruffles on the bottom edge to make skirts for my daughter. Very cute - and for a dollar, I can find the latest colors/patterns at the fabric store!

I've talked to my kids about modesty, and my son will tell me to change the channel b/c someone does not have enough skin covered and God is not pleased. While we need to filter what they see, we need to teach them how to deal with what they DO see, too.

akr said...

I attended a children's conference at Cedarville a few years back and sat in on a session by Dannah Gresh and I think she has some great perspectives and ideas on how to help. With boys they teach them to "bounce their eyes" first from violence that they see and then in the context of sexuality. For girls she addresses modesty as a heart issue first and then helps girls figure out how to look trendy and fashionable and still modest. Her website is http://www.purefreedom.org/

I think we do need to guard our children when they are young but at the same time we have to teach them how to live out in the world as they grow older and how to make right choices. I have seen a lot of kids who were really sheltered who once they were out of the house made poor choices because they were not taught how to think.

I agree we have a resposiblity as parents to raise Godly children but I also believe we are preparing
them for when they do leave home.

Don't get me wrong. I am not advocating letting them watch whatever. My parents were careful about what we watched and had specific guidelines and it helped me to be protected. But,
as we grew older, my parents would talk with us about what was on a show...they were still careful about content but when it was something that may not completely match our values that talked with us and evaluated it with us.

I guess I have seen both extremes - too over protective which leads to kids who do not know how to function well under pressure when they are on their own and too permissive which leads to immoral choices and I really come down in my heart to having balance and teaching my children to think biblically.

I am also grateful we have satellite and we can block channels and set ratings. Jack only gets to watch 1 hour a day and it's Handy Manny and Mickey most of the time. I like Playhouse Disney for the most part and am picky about what shows he can watch.

Anyways...sorry for the book but those are some of my thoughts.

California Coates said...

Oh Tiff what a great post. In the month of May I am going to be dealing with this very issue on my blog and the theology behind it. I don't have girls but 2 boys. It is funny because of my passion for it you'd think I do have girls!

We don't have a special word for Isaac when there is immorality on display we tell him to guard his heart and he immediately knows that he is to look down...so I guess we do have a special word(s).

My husband and I come from very immoral pasts and we are very sensitive to what we subject our children too, until their foundation is built and we are confident they are able to battle the world.

Thanks girl! Love to see unity!

Erin

Kristy K said...

Do you know of any Bible studies related to modesty for little girls? I met with our children's minister a few weeks ago and she would like to start two of them in the fall (I would teach K-3 and she would teach 4-6). We're having a hard time coming up with studies that are age appropriate (and that don't actually put ideas in the girls' heads that they shouldn't be thinking of right now).

For me, the biggest challenge is modeling this behavior for my children. I want modesty to be second nature to my daughter, but then I show to much cleavage on a date night with my hubby. I want my kids to watch wholesome shows on TV, then my hubby and I watch a show with crude language when the kids are in bed.

So I decided this year to dress more modestly, including wearing a bathing suit with shorts (which is actually much more comfortable than the regular ones I've worn) , and we did get rid of cable TV. We have a few basic channels now so we don't watch much and when we do, it's shows that are good for kids and adults. I think the kids' behavior is improving, they aren't being slammed with commercials all the time and their little minds aren't being filled with things that shouldn't be there at this age.

Teaching kids to be in the world but not of the world is HARD! And I know I can't do it on my own. Thankfully I don't have to. :)

Anonymous said...

I believe that (as a Christian myself) if you shelter your children TOO much, they will rebel. My daughter watches cartoons every day, plays outside every day (unless it's raining) is read to every day, and is taken care of. We struggle financially but no one would know it if they saw our house. I'm just saying, I was sheltered a lot as a child mostly due to being in a small town with literally, a churh on EVERY corner (believe me, they're in the guiness book, no lie). My parents raised all 3 of us to be good Christian girls. But, now that I'm older and I live in a big city I notice all the things I missed out on as a little girl and as a married woman, I tried new things, the casino, having a drink (and I'm talking maybe 2 per year) and I literally felt like Hell was calling my name for doing these things. That's just NOT the case. I love and protect my daughter NO matter what, but don't shelter your kids TOO much!

happylovemama said...

This is a great post.

I am grateful that we chose to talk to our kids about why we believe the way we do from a very young age. It's helped as they've gotten older.

Our oldest daughter turned 11 today and while some of the other girls her age wanted cell phones and huge parties, she just wanted lunch with her family and a build-a-bear.

Just keep standing tall and form in your convictions. :)

Anonymous said...

This is a wonderful post.

I think this is something all parents (well most...) struggle with while raising children in today's society. I do, however, agree with Anonymous. You want to be careful as to "sheltering" your children TOO much. I don't necessarily believe all these things should be completely hidden from children, but children must be taught how to properly deal with these things and what is right and what is wrong. Thank you so much for sharing your opinion, I really enjoy reading and seeing what others views are on different subjects, such as this. Have a wonderful, blessed day!

Anonymous said...

Not sure if I agree with this at all. How will your children ever survive in the "real world"? What will your son do when he gets out of your clutches and sees a little cleavage? Will he be scarred for life??? Will your daughter live in petticoats down to her feet her whole life? That is not the kind of life I want to promote for my children. How will they ever learn to critically think if you never allow them to experience anything outside of your perfect safe haven. I think maybe you should rething this whole thing. I think you are going to teach your children to live a very fearful, shallow life. Just sayin'...

Mae said...

I agree with everything you shared.
I have three boys and my husband and I have discussed many times what is appropriate and what is not. We are very particular what they watch on tv, videos, etc. Even though we don't have to worry about bikinis, we do have to think about inappropriate slogans or designs on t-shirts.

We believe that our job as their parents is to protect them and teach them right from wrong. It doesn't matter what the world thinks is right; it matters what God thinks is right.
And it doesn't bother me that some people think we shelter them too much. I am not accountable to other people; I am accountable to God.

However, I do want for them to be able to function in the world. And at appropriate times, we discuss things. My 7 year old (my oldest) and I just recently had a discussion about modesty. He saw a Victoria's Secret commercial while watching Extreme Makeover- Home Edition. (something I thought was fine, but I forgot about the commercials, not always diligent enough) We talked about why it is harmful to see women dressed immodestly and he told me it was because he would be breaking a commandment. "Adultery, mom." (d'uh) I was so proud of him.
At appropriate times, we talk about the world and how the world does things and why it is wrong. So we hope that they will not be unprepared.
In any case, we still feel it is more important to honor God's view of things than man's. And for our family, this means sheltering our children.

Calvary Baptist said...

It never ceases to amaze me that we hide under the "anonymous" tag for our negative feedback--WOW! Oh well, This is Jim, husband of Tiffany... I have to say that some of the counter arguments here seem foolish... not because you disagree, but for the sake of your reasoning--think about the ends to your argument--when does the line of reasoning stop? Is it after the "innocent" glance at "cleavage"? Or when he sees the soft core porn scene in mommy and daddy's movie? Then what is the lesson? Is it, son, don't worry about that--just laugh at the crude humor...
And, not that I have anything against petticoats... but have you taken a moment to look through the photographs on this site? Talk about a straw-man...that is not even a remote reflection on the standards we hold for our children.
Honestly, I think you (anonymous) have bought into a system that justifies your actions at the hands "teaching through real-life." As parents, we must lay aside ourselves for the value of our children... and that does mean protecting them from the pitfalls of worldly thinking... even if it cost you a little entertainment.
PS-you are welcome to disagree-just be brave enough to attach your name to it.

Anna said...

I love this post!!! I only have a 2-month-old, but preserving innocence is SO important. I am so thankful that my parents preserved my innocence for so long. Once lost you cannot get it back.

Thanks for coming by my blog! :)

Annie said...

Tiffany,

It's encouraging to know that you're trying to parent your children in a way that preserves their innocence for as long as possible. I feel as though it's something that isn't valued enough today. We have forgotten what purity is, and forgotten that we are to be holy, as God is holy. I commend you for how you are raising your children, and can only pray to do as well when I have my own.

Annie

My Heart said...

I really don't think that we need to dress our children in petticoats down to their feet (as was pointed out by an anonymous above) and I don't believe that is what is being said in this post at. all! Children can be modestly dressed without looking like they stepped out of Little House on the Prairie.

Obviously I can not shelter my children from seeing someone walking in a mall who is scantily clad or has decided the whole world is priviledged to see her cleavage for free. But I can talk to my children about it when they are shocked that someone would want to represent themselves to the world that way.

Anonymous said...

Well I guess I just stumbled on a close-minded blog. Will leave it alone. Not going to sign my name as I do not own a blog. Cannot see waisting so much of my childrens lives on a blog, like so many others do. leaving now. For good.

Theresa said...

Wow. Way to take a lame, cheap shot. You'll be back... they always come back...

I very much appreciate all the "discussion" here today! Having been raised somewhat sheltered and choosing to raise my girls in such a way it's easy to relax and think that loosening the reigns may be ok... but I've found this all rather encouraging. The pursuit of purity is a noble one and I feel blessed to know there are others pressing on to the same goal- to honor God and seek His ways above the world's :)

Brooke McGlothlin said...

My name is Brooke and I think you are doing the RIGHT thing. I wish my parents had sheltered me more.

Kalyn said...

This is a really awesome post! Thank you for sharing your heart on this issue. Too many people do not discuss it for fear of "offending" or "judging" others.

Anonymous said...

I am one of those "anonymous" people, I began with "This is a wonderful post....". I did not put my name as I do not have a blog. I am not "hiding". My name is Alida. I am a Christian mother of 4.
I don't agree with getting nasty or "mad" about other peoples opinions. People hold very different opinions on everything in todays society. I think it's great that people open up and express their opinions and we get to learn others thoughts on various different subjects.

Sarah said...

hi tiff! you controversial woman you! :) haha.
lovely post. i was just thinking (ie worrying-oops) about my boys and how in the world we can win in this area. even at 3 nic is seeing things, i am sure. and heaven help me if i have a daughter. :)
no matter what, i think the way we are raised and what we are exposed to or not exposed to shapes who we are. God has placed parents in authority to mold little ones, but we can't be God. what a relief. we can only do what we think is right. i think we can all agree what an awesome responsibility we hold.

akr said...

Kevin brought it to simple terms as we talked about it...not allowing them to be desenitized because of over exposure but to be aware of how to protect themselves when they are walking in the mall or facing a temptation...

Carrie said...

Great post! To me, the bottom line is that we are accountable for how we raise our own children, not whether other people think they're too sheltered or something. Good for you for keeping your kids as far away as possible from the filth that is all around us in our culture.

As far as how we handle TV, it is pretty easy since Z is only 2, I totally control what he watches - we have satellite TV with DVR (like Tivo) and I tape certain shows for him like Barney or Sesame Street & give him the choice of one of those per day (or sometimes none if we're gone/busy).

I have my first daughter now, and I never thought as much about the modesty of little girls until she was born! But, yeah, I plan to put a shirt under her spaghetti strap dresses that people have given us, and I plan to have her wear one piece swimsuits. It is crazy to see what's out there for even little teeny girls!

As far as your nasty anonymous commenter, I am sorry that they were so rude to you. This post was very good and thought-provoking, I'm glad you wrote it.

My Heart said...

Just wanted to share a funny little story with you all about this very thing that happened today. My 6 year old son and I went to WalMart and met a woman like I described above (the one who thinks she is gracing you with her cleavage)and my son threw his hand over his eyes and quite loudly (not to be mean to her but out of his shock) said..."Didn't need to see that!"

Thought it was funny how it went hand in hand with your post today.

And to address the hiding behind anonymous I don't think what was meant was to all those who post anonymously just those that post critically or nastily...just what I interpretted anywho.

Anonymous said...

First time reading your blog and really like this post. I have 2 daughters, 12 and 9, and both are naturally modest. My 12 yo refused to put on a bikini when she was 3. It had to be a one-piece and to this day she will only wear a one-piece. No short skirts or spaghetti straps either..her choice. My 9 yo follows in her big sisters foot steps although she will wear skorts with leggings underneath. There are modest clothes out there that are fashionable.
The world isnt raising our children, we parents are. We have to set the example and walk the walk. You cant have mom wearing short skirts and strappy tank tops and then turn around and tell her daughter thats inappropriate for her.
As for "sheltering" our kids too much...kids do have brains and freely discussing these issues with them in a gentle way will prepare them as they grow up and eventually go out into the world. They will do what is right for them.
Thanks for the post!
~Lynn

Melissa said...

Okay, I just had to come and give my 2 cents...again... LOL.

As far as the sheltering goes. I don't see that as a bad thing. God is the perfect example of a parent and he most definitely shelters us. All throughout the Psalms, the Bible talks about God being our Shelter.
Here is just one such passage:

Psalm 91:1 Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. 2 This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I trust him. 3 For he will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease.

The other thing mentioned by other commenters is that when we 'shelter' our kids too much then they won't know how to deal with the world when they get out of the house. I don't think this is true either. As I mentioned in my earlier response, God tells us to be wise about what is good and simple about what is evil, and he tells us to get wisdom all throughout the proverbs and then tells us that wisdom is PURE... And the verse that Tiffany mentioned about thinking on things that are good and true and lovely, etc. Do you really think that God will tell us that, and then say "Well, you do that, but I'm not going to give you the skill and guidance to cope with the evils in the world when you go out into it." I mean, really? What kind of God do you think he is? He loves us, and guides us, and protects us, and leads us... Not just when we are sheltered in our home, but when we face the choices and evils of the world as well. Knowing what is good IS enough to guide us... God doesn't say we need to dabble in evil and sin and experience it on the fringes so that we know what we are up against. NOPE. He says he wants our hearts to be pure, good, true, honest, innocent... When you are full of light, it is easy to recognize darkness...

Erin said...

Hi Tiffany,

I read your blog yesterday and I wanted to respond but got very busy.

I was not walking close to The Lord when my Kelsey was born and I allowed her to wear the baby bikinis (and other "cute clothes) because I thought it was adorable. It wasn't until she was 5 that I realized how wrong I was in my choices as a parent and I think God for opening my eyes. However, Kelsey questioned me because she was able to wear a bikini the year before...why not now? It was a challenge that I had to overcome and I think The Lord helped me with it.

I said all that to say that I agree with your post now although I never would have several years ago. I am thankful that my eyes were opened to the importance of being set apart from the world.

But this isn't an issue big enough (in my opinion) for people to get "wrapped around the axel" about. Seriously. It's kids clothes...not the dead sea scrolls. I was surprised by some of the negative feedback and I am sure you were too.

Because of Him, my nine-year-old has embraced modesty and I am so thankful for it....but it was a journey to get here.

Good for you for starting early.

God Bless You and Jim,

Erin

Anonymous said...

These are good comments about a very important issue. A related subject area I would like to see addressed is how to raise boys to not only preserve the innocence but instill the proper attitudes they should have towards girls. A couple of comments make me think that families with all boys may not need to be as concerned with these issues as families with girls.

Great job, Tiffany. Count me in as one of your fans although I don't have the required accounts and don't read your blog every day.

Bruce Barber

melissa said...

great post as always tiffany. i love your passion for raising your children to be of great character. do what you do...keep sharing:)

its okay if people don't agree (wink)

Mrs. Haid said...

This is an interesting idea. my friend Chrissy pointed me to this site because I have an infant and I watch Dancing with the Stars (and love the show). She wondered if I have thought about preserving his innocence.

I suppose I have not.

I think the ideas are interesting. I don't think I will do many of these things, but as a young and perhaps immature 27 year old parent, maybe I will one day.

Interesting discussion.

PS, I am really curious about this Raising Housewives thing (RH?) I don't think I would have liked my family to be a part of this when I was a girl, but now that I do have a house and a husband and a baby, I have no idea how to do things like this. Really interesting!

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