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Thursday, January 26, 2012

.Expectantly Waiting.

This time around feels a little bit different. I cannot put my finger on exactly what it is. I am just as excited to adopt this time. I am just as passionate about orphan care and our responsibility to care for orphans, and I am just as convicted about being a voice for the voiceless and standing up for justice for these little ones. I have already felt my heart begin that pregnant swell as Sophia is being tightly knitted there. I think of her, I pray for her, and I long to know her, but I feel more settled this time around. Calmer. Perhaps, it is because we have walked this road once before, and have seen the beautiful way that God orchestrates the finances, the timing - well, everything. I don't feel any less passionate or excited, but I don't feel the urgency that was so intense from the very beginning of our journey to Jamesy. I don't feel complacent, though, either. I am just trying to rest in God's timing, knowing full well that it is perfect. Perhaps that is because Sophia is not ready yet, or perhaps I am truly growing in my faith.

Regardless, I am excited. I don't care as much what people think this time around, and yet I have not been quite so vocal. I am leaning into Jesus and listening for His Spirit to direct my words. I understand more now than ever before, the blessings that come with obeying God no matter how crazy it appears to others. So I am closing my eyes to fear of man this time, and opening them to the path God has before us - whatever it may include. The children already talk of Sophie, just like they did of Jamesy. She is part of our family, before we have ever laid eyes on her.

We are standing still for the moment in our journey. Our fat, pink notebook is ready and waiting to be filled to capacity with the documents that will help us reach our daughter.

001 adopttee

But for now, we wait on God's timing, to provide the finances. I know He will, I just don't know how or when. So we wait! We are in the process of designing some tees to help raise funds and spread awareness, and we are selling Just Love Coffee again, but mostly we are waiting - expectantly waiting. For my expectation is from Him.

Truly my soul silently waits for God; from Him comes my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be greatly moved … My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be moved. Psalm 62:1-2, 5-6

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