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Monday, January 23, 2012

.My Heart.

I've only spent a handful of hours with him, but I've spent days pleading in prayer for him. He has my heart.


This teenage boy from the streets of Ethiopia - Habtamu. My Habi, as Jim affectionately nicknamed him. It has been a year since my world collided with him. And I am a completely different person. His soft brown eyes, and shy smile, and that nervous way he chews his lower lip, turned my world inside out from the moment I locked eyes with him. I knew in that instant that I had to fight for him. I just wasn't sure how, and honestly I am still not sure. If I had my way, I would get on a plane tomorrow and bring him back home with me. But that does not seem to be the plan, and although it breaks my heart, I am trusting that God has a bigger, better plan. I just cannot see what even the possibility of that plan might be.

It's hard communicating this love I have for a boy, whom is virtually a stranger. I know it makes no sense. I cannot explain it, except it is a God-thing - God orchestrated. Yesterday we were able to skype with Habi, for the first time in months. I don't have words for what it means to me to be able to see his face, and hear that accent, and the way he calls me Mom. When he calls me Mom I feel every bit of that title, and my heart tightens around this precious boy even more. He kept calling me beautiful this time, but he is the beautiful one - my konjo (beautiful in Amharic) Habi.

This was the momentous moment I am latching onto from this past week. While it was happy in the moment, talking to my Habi always leaves me feeling empty and helpless after the fact. My arms don't reach to Ethiopia, and when this teenage boy, who calls me Mom and Beautiful is over there needing us, it really, really stinks. I am thankful that my Jesus is enough for Habi, though, and I am praying that Habi will see that and know Him.

Jesus is enough for me, and my aching heart as well.


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