.He did It.

It was just the three of us, late last night. Jim and I snuggled on the couch, and Habi reclined in a chair. We were relaxing and enjoying being together. The finish line was so close that we could taste it. Today Habi woke up for his last day of his first year in an American school. And last night as Jim and I were reiterating just how proud we were of the work he had put in this year, he looked at us shyly beneath those heavy lashes and said, this is the first school year I have ever finished  - not just in America. He had been hinting about that for a few weeks (prior to this, we had understood that he had completed three years of an education in Ethiopia), but came out and told us last night that he had never fully completed one. I am blown away by this child, who never completed even one year of school prior to coming here, who didn't have the rhythm of attending school, or an education background - no study skills, no learning hooks to hang all of this new information on (he had to develop them all from scratch this year), just a few days here and there of scattered education in Ethiopia, that he managed to squeeze in between working to earn money to buy food in order to literally survive. He was never taught English. Ever. He taught himself to speak it, by listening to foreigners and well educated people in Ethiopia. He somehow got a hold of the English alphabet and taught himself how to write the letters - figuring out the strokes painstakingly on his own. The fact that he does not have an education background does not diminish his brilliance, it illuminates it. He came to America, and was plopped into an accelerated private school in the seventh grade - having never completed one year of school before. How frightening this should have been.

But he did it with grace and courage. I really do not know a braver teenage boy than Habi.

As an adult, I cannot imagine that I would have done nearly as well if I were in his position. This year has not  been easy. It has been miraculous, and beautiful, and emotional, but not easy. Redemption never is. God provided the perfect school for Habi to attend that would help meet his needs. It is small, close-knit, non-legalistic, and the staff went above and beyond to help Habi and to help us help Habi. I am sure this is the first time that the school had a student with the background that Habi came from, but they did not shy away from the challenge and both staff and students embraced him. Habi grew confident in this environment, and I believe for the first time he felt and knew love from so many sides. This was as valuable as the academics.

There were hours and hours of homework this year. There were tears, there was determination, there was arguments and disagreements, there was perseverance and there was discouragement. Every single person inside our family sacrificed to make this happen. When we thought we could not handle one more algebraic equation, or history date, or science definition, when we felt strangled by the literature, by the monotonous phonics work, we linked arms and did it together. And one assignment after another piled up into an entire school year, and in the midst of traveling 3 plus hours a day, Jamesy's therapies, attaching as a family, medical crises, grief for a country and loved ones an ocean away, the Spirit pushing us to move on, in the midst of the exhaustion and lies that Satan loves to feed children from hard places, in the midst of the biggest transition in all of our lives, the calendar has fallen through months and we have made it to the finish line.

And it was worth it to see Habi's beaming face this morning, to know the accomplishment he feels in having a full school year under his belt. I cannot make people understand what this year has been like, and it is not my job, to. I am learning to brush off the criticism and the emails and messages that accuse me of giving Habi more attention than my other three children. The snide remarks about how many photos took up my facebook and blog of Habi and the lacking of photos of the other three. What I cannot make people understand who have never dealt with it, is how much lost time we have to make up for, how empty his love bucket was when he came to us, how insecure, lonely, and needy our son was. How critical this first year was. How two of my children were born into a home filled with love, words of affirmation, cuddles and daily their little love buckets are filled (and were still being filled this year), and one child two years of the same, and is finally starting to understand the permanence of our love. But Habi, came to us empty, so empty in so many ways, and while his story is sacred for him so I type carefully here, he NEEDED every single time his mama or daddy bragged about him on facebook, he needed the adoration, the public display of love, the photos, the screaming and cheering from the sidelines, the over-the-top excitement for every single first. He needed it and he still needs it, and I am done apologizing or feeling guilty. Because the result and the redemption that is happening is because God guided us to love him up BIG - in outrageous ways this year. I regret none of it.

 He is not the same child that we met two years ago. He is not the same child that stepped onto American soil last July. And he is not the same child who bravely entered seventh grade this September. God, truly, has changed his life......and our life in the process.

You did it, my sweet, beautiful, brave boy! Keep following Jesus, for He is so very, very near. He always was, Baby. When you felt the loneliest, He was right there. And He is here now, and so are we. I love you. To Ethiopia and back.

.The Most wonderful Time of the Year.

It is, isn't it? This season is so full of expectation and wonder. I love Christmas. I love passing on Christmas traditions to my children. Above all else I love teaching my littles that the reason for the beauty, the excitement, the expectation surrounding Christmas is all and only because of Jesus. In order to do this, Jim and I have to be so purposeful in every single thing we do in celebrating Christmas; we want it all to communicate Jesus. It is intentional living to the max, and it is worth it if my children know and understand that Christmas equals Jesus. (Perhaps more on this in a later post, like how I almost had a breakdown this year decorating for Christmas.)



Our tree is decorated, and I am starting to love our fake tree. Every year it grows on me a bit more. Scotty is severely allergic to real trees. We learned that a few years ago, having a real tree in our home for less than 24 hours and Scotty almost landing in the hospital.

Our special ornaments are hung - like baby's first Christmas and the little handmade ones.













Traditions have started.



The name of Jesus is on our lips, and it is truly the most wonderful time of the year!

In the midst of this we are praising God that our family is all together this year.The bigs are praying for Jamesy's EEG today, and so am I.

.Today's Moment Cherished.

The other night we had one of Jim's old college friends, from Ohio, over for dinner. I heard Jim talking to him about this blog. He explained why I started it, and why I write. Jim spoke my love language that evening. He gets me. He really gets me, and he understands this passion that God gave to me. Jim has always encouraged my writing and blogging from the beginning. He is really good about encouraging me to carve out time for this.

Long after the conversation from that night, I was thinking over what he had said, and it renewed in me the original purpose of this blog - to cherish the moments with my family, while my children are still little. This blog has morphed so much as God continues to orchestrate our family and change Jim and I into what I pray are people who look more like Jesus, but at the center of the blog I want my original purpose to still be found. Sometimes it is easier to pick out and remember the hard moments, to tick them off one by one and to grow weary, but it is healing refreshing and necessary to take the time to notice and thank God for a moment cherished.

Today I am clinging to and nurturing this moment.



Cadi read Luke 1:5-25 to me today out of her glittery, pink princess Bible. She read about Zechariah ("Zechamiah" according to her) and Elizabeth's longing for a son. Cadi's beautiful, soft, girly little voice read the big Word of God, and it washed over me and pillowed its way into my heart.

This, this is why I taught her to read and to love reading.

What is today's moment cherished for you?

.God's Best Gift.

Psalm 127:3 Don't you see that children are God's best gift?



And I have three of these best gifts. Some days I am still in shock, and most days we all still marvel over every single little detail about Jamesy - just like Scotty in this photo. It's still hard to believe he is here sometimes.

So thankful.



Don't forget to enter my give away!

.That's How we Roll.

Take 1.

Take 2.

Take 3.

We had a picnic at Jim's parent's home this weekend with his family. This was one attempt at family photos.

.Feeling Refreshed.

Oh, how I love writing and encouraging other women via my blog, but it has been refreshing to take a break for a bit. Thanks for grace and patience.

I am not going to dive right back into writing today, but tomorrow look for a new Wedded Wednesday post! We have been enjoying the start of our summer break. I have been getting things organized for Cadi's Kindergarten Graduation on Saturday {sob}. Basically we have just been thoroughly enjoying being a family of five.

Photo is thanks to my sweet friend, T who was the amazing photographer at Bethany's wedding.

Our meeting with our social worker went well on Saturday. It was like meeting with an old friend, and I am not just saying that because she reads here, either! [Hi Kristen!] Jim and I have said over and over that our social worker has been a huge blessing. She was handpicked just for us, and we cannot imagine taking this journey with anybody else. It is no secret that we hope God leads us to adopt again (and possibly again and again??!), and we look forward to continuing this relationship with Kristen.

And now I am off to relax with a book while my children finish their naps. Ooooh, I do love the summer!

.I Want My Jesus.

He had colored the little black and white drawing of Jesus, who was now glued to a Popsicle stick. Another paper was glued with white, puffy cotton balls in an attempt to look like clouds. Jesus could carefully be pushed through the slit in the cloud paper to look as if He was ascending into heaven. Scotty is always really proud of the papers he colors in Sunday School. He was especially fond of this one. Perhaps it was the ability to move Jesus in and out of the clouds - fascinating for a two year old I am sure.

On the way home from church, Scotty was strapped in his car seat happily playing with his Sunday School Jesus and Jim was driving. It was just the two of them that morning as Cadi and Jamesy were not feeling well, so I stayed home to care for them. All of sudden Jim heard crying and screaming coming from behind him.

I want my Jesus!

I want my Jesus!

I want my Jesus!

Scotty had dropped the Popsicle stick that had Jesus glued to it.

As Jim told me of this account after arriving home, my thoughts slowed and stilled. When was the last time I had cried out like that?

When was the last time I truly yearned and cried for my Jesus? When would nothing else and no one else do? In that moment, Scotty was so consumed by Jesus (yes, his Popsicle stick one) that nothing else could satisfy his longing. Am I consumed by my Jesus or am I letting other things, other people satisfy the longing?

Today I will walk in the presence of Jesus. I am purposing to long for Him- my rescuer - the One who redeemed my soul and pours His grace out over me.

Today I will abide in him, because I want my Jesus.

.Sometimes I Have to Pinch Myself.

Especially when I walk into a room and see this - all three of my children together.

It has been six weeks today that Jamesy has been in our home- safe and sound in our arms - surrounded by his family.

It seems as if this six weeks have flown by and at the same time as if he has been here forever.

The moment Jamesy was carried off of the plane, Scotty stepped into his brand new role as big brother. The shoes fit. He was created for that role.

I get it now. I get why families adopt over and over. It is because they have encountered a real, living, breathing miracle of redemption, as they are able to witness the change in a child, when love and family are finally given to one.

How a child goes from this

To this.

And I now see why I will never lay my head on my pillow again, or look into the eyes of my sweet brown-eyed boy, without thinking of the faces of the countless others whom we left behind. Starving and literally dieing for this thing called family.

The need is huge, even unthinkable and overwhelming. No, we cannot change the life for every orphan, but many of us can change the life of one or two or... And honestly you will be the one truly changed.

I certainly was.

I've heard it said that the need for families to adopt, and for the church to participate in orphan care, is not really that great. How this is just a passing fad. But I know the truth. Every night I hold that need in my arms and rock him to sleep.

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.Apple Palooza.

(Alternately titled: The Post in Which I Make up for not Blogging in a Week.)

Palooza: An exaggerated event.

Yup, that is what has been going on here - an exaggerated "event" of using all of my apples up! Jim has been away a lot this week, Cadi has been sick, and Scotty is a cute little ball of perpetual motion. So to keep myself sane, I pulled out my recipe cards and started peeling apples. That was my therapy for the week, and it worked!

I thought some of my readers might be looking to use up some apples or just wanting some new fall recipes, so I decided to share.

Roasted Applesauce
Last year I made applesauce for the first time. It was just a small batch that we ate right away. It was part of Cadi's preschool curriculum. A recipe was included in her curriculum, but I wanted something a bit more complex. I searched the internet until I found one, and it was delicious! After I made the applesauce a friend of mine, one of the GREATEST prayer warriors in our adoption (!), Kathy, asked if I had ever roasted my applesauce. She sent me a recipe, and I vowed to try it this year.

**If you enjoy trying new recipes, you will want to follow her new cooking/baking blog! I always know that anything Kathy makes will be excellent! I have used several of her recipes in the past, and I have never been disappointed!**

Somehow I lost last years roasted applesauce recipe, but I found this one. I decided to use his roasting method but my recipe from last year, and the results were perfect - not too sweet, perfectly spiced, caramelized apple goodness! I prefer my applesauce chunky. I am not a big fan of pudding and jellos because of their lack of substance. However, if you prefer a smooth applesauce simply put it through your Foley Food Mill after roasting it.



1.Gather your apples - you will need 4lbs (which is approximately 12 apples). As you can see I did not use the apples we picked. I used the "seconds" or "dropped apples" that we purchased. This is what my mom always did growing up. If there was a really rotten spot I just cut it out.

2.Wash, peel, core, and slice your apples. Place them in a deep roasting pan. Add 1/2 C. cider, a 1/2 C. water, 4 strips of lemon peel, 3-4 T. lemon juice, one cinnamon stick, 1/4 C. dark brown sugar, up to 1/4 C. white sugar (I used 1/8 C), 1/2 tsp. salt, and grated nutmeg to your taste.



Put the roasting pan in a 400 degree preheated oven uncovered. Roast for 1-2 hours depending on how dark and caramelized you prefer - stirring often. I roasted my first batch for about 1.5 hours and my second and third batch for about 2 hours.



This was the first batch.



I was surprised how little 3 batches made! I froze 5 Quart bags of sauce, and I will no doubt be making more again soon.



Click here for the printable recipe. (I do not remember which website I found the recipe on for this sauce, but it is NOT original to me.)


Apple Crisp
I also made apple crisp this week. I am picky about my apple crisp, and I really think this is the BEST apple crisp recipe ever. Yes, it is sweet and totally unhealthy, but you only have it one time of year! Right??? This recipe was originally a Taste of Home recipe. Click here for the printable recipe.




Mile High Apple Pie
The last apple recipe I made this week was apple pie. I LOVE apple pie especially when paired with some extra sharp cheese. I actually love fruit pie period. Although I am not really a pastry lover besides pie. I guess I just do not enjoy the taste of lard! Ha! And to that end I searched for a lot of years for the perfect crust recipe - using no crisco and only butter. I finally found it last Spring. Sometimes I use whole wheat flour with good results. This pie was made with all purpose, though. Here is the printable recipe for my crust. This also happens to be the easiest pie crust that I have ever worked with.

The secret to getting a mile high or deep dish apple pie is to cook your apples down before putting them in your crust to bake. If you do not they will cook down in your pie and your crust will end up caving in.


Here are my apples gently cooking. Be sure to watch them. You do not want them to turn into sauce!





And the final product! Can you smell it? MMMMM....


Click here for the printable recipe.

If you think the only thing I have been doing during my blogging break was baking, well you'd be wrong.



We had a very belated birthday party for Cadi in which my mom decorated and made this awesome Arthur cake! My daughter's first crush is on an aardvark - hmmm.



My children have been fascinated with the new gold fish that my parents gave her for her birthday. The fish has had several name changes from Dorthy, to Annie, to Julianna. I am not sure what the name is today. {grin}



I have been taking care of a sick little girl. She is on the mend, but she still in not 100%. We did take her to the doctor's as I feared she may have an ear infection that I just was not curing with my homeopathic remedies. She doesn't, but she was put on allergy meds. for a bit. We will see what happens.

We took Friday and Monday off from school because of Cadi, but then jumped right back into our unit on apples! Scotty has loved joining in, too. We are actually having so much fun with How to Bake an Apple Pie and See the World that I am going to "row" it for a third week. There are just so many activities and learning opportunities that can be pulled from this book. If you have not read it with your children I highly recommend it!



And for the first time I let Scotty use paint. I am probably crazy, but it was a really fun memory. And the clean up is done now. {wink}



We also received a very exciting email packet from our agency titled "Welcome to Travel!".



No, this was not our court date, but it was filled with our itinerary and packing instructions and all kinds of exciting things! This hopefully means our court date is in the very near future!!

Oh, and I did bake yummy Starbucks-like pumpkin scones for our Sunday school class. I found the recipe here (it was the 3rd post down).

Phew... were you able to stick with me?! Well, that should do it for a bit. Hope you are all well.

Oh wait!! Thank you so much to all of you who have recently donated to our adoption fund. You are such an incredible blessing. We now only lack $5000 TOTAL for our adoption expenses!!! Can you believe it?! God is GREAT!

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