Parenting is a huge undertaking. It does matter who I am today, because who I am today is molding who my children will be tomorrow.
I have some type A tendencies, not completely that is for sure, but I definitely strive on structure and controlling my environment and circumstances. If I can structure and control my life then I can actually present more like a type B personality - calm, patient, relaxed, etc. When things get out of control for me then I present more and more like a type A personality. I Baby-wised my first two children for this very reason. I needed (or thought anyway) that they had to be on a rigorous schedule and had to be sleep and feeding trained in order that I may feel as if I had some kind of control. And it appeared to work - at least I felt in control, my children slept beautifully, followed a schedule, and were great babies.
But after bringing Jamesy home, something wasn't feeling all that right. It started with little things, like Jamesy's need to be rocked and cuddled to sleep. It made me reconsider the way I had sleep-trained my first two and wonder at what I had possibly missed out on with them. Rocking Jamesy has made for some of the sweetest moments that I have encountered with my littlest boy. I never sat and watched my other two children's eye lids grow droopy and heavy or received the sleepy, silly grins from them as they fell off into slumber. It has been a precious gift, and honestly I do not want the rocking to end!
Grace Based Parenting by Dr. Tim Kimmel. We are only in a few chapters right now.
We probably will not agree with everything Dr. Tim Kimmel shares - he is human after all, so we will not blindly accept his ideas, but we will filter everything we read through the Bible and make changes that we need to make. I can already tell that our philosophy of discipline is getting rocked and changing, and I am glad. I am slowly learning that it is not all about rules.
Our children need to be raised by parents who treat them the way Christ treats us as parents. p.97
So this summer I am relearning how to parent, and I am thankful for the grace He has given me - even in this.
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