I've been thinking a lot lately about the other woman.
The other woman, being the one who is blessed to carry my child. In an effort to sort through these thoughts that have been consuming me, I thought I would write this post, as if I was writing to her.
I have thought about you a lot lately. I've thought of you while I am here at home caring for my two blessings and my husband. I have wondered about you. Wondered if you have anyone you are caring for right now. Are you alone? Are you lonely? Who are you? Have you walked this road before, or are you like me and this is all new? Are you old, or are you young - merely a child yourself?
I realize because of the timing of these things, that your baby - our baby - may not even be growing inside of you yet. That is strange to think about. But if the baby is already there, I wonder what you are thinking. What are you feeling? Do you know how this story ends? Do you already know that you will be giving your sweet child away? What kind of tragedy must you go through for me to end up with such a big blessing? I have imagined all kinds of situations and cried over your pain.
I've been praying for you. I know that without you, this wouldn't work. I am thankful and humbled and heartbroken for you. I've been praying for your salvation, too. Earnestly praying. Do you know my Jesus? Do you know the One who died for you; Who cherishes you? I want to able to spend eternity with you- the woman who carried my child. I want to be able to tell you stories and memories and thank you face to face. I pray for your safety, for your health, for your peace and comfort.
As excited as we are, it doesn't seem quite right at all you have to miss out on and give up. This isn't how God wanted your story to go, and I know that. My heart hurts for all that has been stolen from you and your child. I know God has a sovereign plan, and I know that He predestined for me to be your child's mommy. But I am still sad at how it has to happen. I feel so indebted to you. The only way I can even begin to repay you is to protect, cherish, and love this little life with my own life.
And I will. I promise you, I will.
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Tuesday, May 18, 2010
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10 comments:
these are thoughts and words and prayers you will repeat for the rest of your life.
i do. every day. i was able to meet and spend time with my son's birth mother prior to her deciding to place him with us. and though i know her, i still pray those prayers... and cry those tears
This is beautiful!
Beautiful and sweet. If she ever could read this I'm sure she would be crying tears of happiness that her baby was going to a family that is so loving.
beautiful!
Tiffany,
I can't tell you how many times this will all rush through your head! You think of all she misses, but yet you're ever so grateful that you're the one that gets to be there for those moments. It's very emotional. I've just always prayed that God would be every thing she needs when she needs it and give her peace and comfort in knowing she did the right thing and that her son was safe and loved!
Beautiful post!
Hugs,
Tammy
Your words brought tears to my eyes. I am the blogger who shared that we are just being led to adopt from India at Like a Warm Cup of Coffee. Followed you here. Its so neat that the blogosphere can connect us with others who are sharing a similiar journey for whatever reason. Blessings!
Oh, this is such a beautiful letter ... one that I hope you'll have the chance to give to its owner someday.
Does stuff like that ever happen?
Oh, such sweet words from a sweet heart. I just saw your post on our AWAA YG! I love your blog already! My husband, Jeff, and I just sent our info off to USCIS. We are requesting a little boy 0 to 6 mos. Glad to go along this journey with you!
I often think,too, of our son's birth mom. I pray for her frequently and even sent her wishes from my heart to hers (though I don't know her), on Mother's Day. Sad, that their pain is our gain. I, too, pray that God helps these women feel an unsurpassed peace that their birth child is unconditionally loved and lead to know our Lord!
Blessings to you and your family! :o)
I love your letter, it is much like one I have written. This adoption is such an amazing thing beautiful and a true gift from the Lord but yet full of grief. The first time I held my daughter I was washed in such joy and peace and yet such grief and heartache. There is not a day that goes by without my praying for her birthmother. There isn't a smile on my daughters face that I don't thank the Lord for the amazing woman who chose life for my baby. I absolutely LOVE watching your journey as you sort through all the worlds of emotions that come with adoption, I just relate even though ours was domestic, I just relate!
beautiful! your blog is truly touching...
i am your newest follower!
www.housemadehome.net
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