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Tuesday, October 13, 2009

.I should be doing other things.

I sit at my computer with a mental checklist of things to do a mile long. Those window treatments I mentioned a few posts back still need to be sewn, I have over 100 photos from my last shoot that need to be edited, I have a Bible study to work through, dishes to be washed, floors to be cleaned, books to read, recipes to organize, and the list goes on. But here I sit.
God is doing some crazy things in our life right now. Things I cannot share at this moment. Things that make me scared out of my mind and question. And it is amazing how these "things" have tilted my world and brought it to a screeching hault. I told my best friend that now is when I need to put feet to my faith, and I fear I may fail. Scary.
Have you ever tried to go about your normal daily tasks with the weight of the world on your shoulders? It's kind of hard. I will be teaching my Cadi letters and sounds one moment and the next my mind is so entwined and wrapped up in these matters that I myself am forgetting what sound 'u' makes. It's disconcerting, but at the same time it is really refreshing to be in this constant communication with God. To breathe His name and seek His wisdom, help, and peace constantly - for really there is nothing left to do.
I have been pouring over the Scriptures searching for wisdom and answers and peace. I feel as if I cannot trust my heart, and I am trying to discern the Spirit's leading in the muddiness of my thoughts. Scripture is a big help in allowing me to hear "the voice of Truth". So I cling to that and to my God who holds the future. What do you cling to when your heart is anxious and unsure?
It is a strange season for our family. I covet your prayers.

"The Voice of Truth"

Oh,what I would do to have
the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

But the waves are calling out my name
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

Oh, what I would do
to have the kind of strength it takes
To stand before a giant
with just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound
of a thousand warriors
shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

But the giant's calling out
my name and he laughs at me
Reminding me of all the times
I've tried before and failed
The giant keeps on telling me
time and time again
"Boy you'll never win,
you'll never win."

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

But the stone was just the right size
to put the giant on the ground
and the waves they don't seem so high
from on top of them looking down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
when I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
singing over me

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
The Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
And the Voice of truth says "this is for my glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me (calling out to me)
I will choose to listen and believe (I will choose to listen and believe)
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth

I will listen and believe
I will listen and believe the Voice of truth
I will listen and believe
'Cause Jesus you are the Voice of truth
And I will listen to you.. oh you are the Voice of truth

Photobucket

8 comments:

Carrie said...

Your new header & blog design are gorgeous! I will be praying for your family, that God will show you clearly what He wants for you, and then give you the strength & courage to follow through faithfully. Thanks for sharing!

rameelin said...

Hi!!!
Thanks for visiting my blog. When I came to yours I immediately got excited! My husband plays the guitar too, I have one little girl and a cutie pie boy. We have alot in common! And I LOVE your writing and entries. I cant wait to get to know you better....!
-Ramee

Jennifer said...

My prayers will be with your family as you seem to be going through exactly what we are. There have been some incredible transformations in our lives since we have started studying the Bible here at home. Who we were just a mere 6 months ago is gone and we welcome God into our home everyday to continue to grow for Him.

Thanks for stopping by my blog!

B said...

Wow, I can so totally relate..... You very eloquently worded what I have been unable to convey in words. Have you heard the song 'Praise You in this Storm' also by Casting Crowns? I love the first verse... I too look around and wonder that God hasn't "stepped in to save the day" and am learning to choose to praise Him daily in spite of the storms.
Praying for you today!

B

Jenna said...

I know how you feel about not knowing if you can trust your heart, and your mind's thoughts being muddy. I thought we went through the worst of it a little over two years ago, but this transition time we are in now is stretching and taking me places I never imagined going! You are all in my prayers!

Sara said...

Tiffany,

I had one of these days myself just a little over a week ago. I know that I prayed and I cried a lot that day as I struggled to hold on to what little faith i seemed to have left. Some moments were better than others, i reflected a lot on other "holding faith" moments. I reflected a lot on God's faithfulness to me throughout my entire life and that gave me comfort. I also thought about God's faithfulness to the Israelites even when they were not faithful to him.

I talked to my husband and asked him why he wasn't worried and crying too and he simply said "I've been worried and crying for months but I've also been praying. Sara, God will pull through."

I think that you are doing all that you possibly can do, keep bringing it to his feet, surrendering your life to him, taking his will and remembering that it is good. Not because it's easy, or painless, or full of plenty of bounty, but because he is using it for our sanctification and for his ultimate glorification.

Sara

Joy of the Day said...

I'm praying for clarity and direction for you all. God has your lives carefully crafted out, and I take so much comfort in that. Our lives are in transition - we don't know how long we will be in AZ, and that can be scary yet exciting to trust Him. He is growing my faith in Him so much these days.

Unknown said...

I heart that song... and Casting Crowns!

Shannon

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