.Real Babies.

Her name was Beulah Cora. She had chubby cheeks, round, bright eyes, long yellow piggy tails, and adorable dimples. I thought she was beautiful, and I loved her. She was my beloved Cabbage Patch doll. I slept with her, ate with her, and played with her. In the summer I would tag along with my mom to various yard sales, and I would spend my allowance on newborn clothing for her.

There were others, Heather, being one. She was my 1980's Real Baby doll. I saved up my birthday money for her. I still remember the way she smelled, and how she came with a hospital id bracelet. She spent countless hours being pushed in my little plastic buggy, tucked under the cozy dolly quilt a sweet neighbor had made for me. Her plastic cheeks were smothered in kisses, and her little rose bud mouth was often subject to my homemade "baby food" - a mixture of warm water and flour.

Carrie Beth had curly hair - blond - I do not remember where she came from. I do remember dressing her tiny body, whispering love notes into her ear, and tucking her in between my sister and I each night. My last dolly of childhood was unlikely. It was a troll baby, and she smelled like baby powder and wore a shock of bright pink hair. I received this doll on my thirteenth birthday, and I remember, even then, knowing it would be my last ever baby doll. I think the gift was meant to be a part of my miniature troll collection not really a "doll", but I loved her like every other baby doll that had preceded her. She was only loved for a short time, before she retired to a shelf in my room towering over the miniature trolls. I remember feeling sad about that, and once in awhile in my younger teen years taking her off of the shelf and giving her a quick hug, breathing in that baby powder scent, and reluctantly putting her back. I had outgrown her too quickly.

When I was the age that my daughter is now, my greatest desire in all of the world was to be a mommy and to have babies. Not quite knowing how the baby thing all worked, I would lay in bed at night and pray and pray that God would make my baby dolls come alive. Sometimes for extra measure, I would start the night out hiding my baby dolls behind the couch in our living room. I would then run back to my room, squeeze my eyes closed and beg God to make them real. Disappointment choked me every time I ran back to the couch to peek on those dolls. But I always believed that one day, I would run to the couch or wake up and find that my dolls had become real babies.

They never did become real babies, but I never stopped believing that one day I would be a real mommy with real babies of my own. I could not imagine anything better then taking care of and loving my own babies.

It's a silly memory that I have tucked away, but I am realizing that my childhood dream came true. I am a mommy to three beautiful babies. My little six year old self intrinsically knew that she was created to mommy. I wish I could go back and tell her how truly wonderful, amazing, and even better it would be than she had dreamed.



Me with my real babies.

.Thanksgiving Snapshots.

We had to stay home this Thanksgiving, as both Scotty and Cadi were sick, and Jamesy had an extremely drippy nose. (Today Scotty is finally fever free and acting more like himself. I am so thankful. He scared me. Cadi continues to run a fever on and off, but it seems as if she did not get the virus as severely as Scotty. My pinched nerve is almost gone.)



Jamesy wanted nothing to do with photographs yesterday - not even quick snapshots. Poor Cadi was feeling awful, and Scotty was just trying to be smiley and happy despite being sick



Although the photos are far from perfect this Thanksgiving - I never even really changed my camera settings - I just shot - I will cherish the photos from our day and remember our first ever Thanksgiving at home.

I have never roasted any kind of whole poultry. Jim does not care for it. On Thanksgiving he typically just eats the side dishes. On Wednesday morning, with Scotty still spiking a very high fever, we knew that we would be hunkered down at home. So Jim and I planned a menu -compromising as we both grew up with different foods on Thanksgiving. I was willing to forgo the turkey and bake a spiral ham, but Jim decided to let me try a turkey. He was brave!

I like poultry, but I am really squeamish about cooking it. When we first got married I would cook chicken breasts in my dishes, and then I would not be able to eat it because I had handled it. I would make a terrible farmer's wife! Well, yesterday was kind of like that, but I did manage to eat a bit. I cooked my turkey upside down after browsing the Internet for help. It made the breast meat really tender and moist. We liked it - even Jim.


Our ten pound fresh turkey.





My three turkeys.

I wanted one nice photo of the three of them in the outfits I had made. It was not to happen yesterday!




It was really nice to have a slow-paced day. We all snuggled on the couch and watched the whole Macy's Day Parade and ate my Mom's "num-nums" (my family's name for chex mix). Jim recorded it, so we started watching at 10 and fast forwarded the commercials. This worked great for the children.














We ate our Thanksgiving dinner early afternoon.





Turkey
Gravy
Make ahead mashed potatoes
Broccoli casserole
Sweet potato souffle'
Southern cornbread stuffing
Pear Salad
Wassail
Cheese cake for dessert
(Cinnamon pull apart pumpkin bread for breakfast)

Jamesy fell into a turkey coma at the table. He out-ate us all at his first Thanksgiving! We got such a kick out of watching him eat. {grin}



In the evening Jim and I taught Cadi to play Uno. We had so much fun! You can tell from these photos she still was not feeling well.







We enjoyed homemade (alcohol free) wassail all through the day. It made our home smell sooo cozy.



Jamesy kept peeking over the table at us as we played Uno.



We ended our evening with NY Cheesecake.

All in all it was a wonderful, relaxing, and very different Thanksgiving. I think we will look back on it with fond memories.

Last night I made stock from the turkey carcass, and today I am going to make a creamy turkey noodle soup. If it turns out yummy, I will try to remember to post the recipe here.

I have so much to be thankful for today and always.

I am not sure why God's grace has poured out on me in the form of this life I live. I am overflowing with thankfulness.

So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness. Col. 2:6-7

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.I Remember.

I remember quickly typing out this post while my firstborn soundly slept in a bouncy seat at my feet. I remember our tiny apartment and the wonderful first moments of being a mommy. Looking back on this post I cannot believe how quickly time has passed, how much Cadi has grown, how much I have grown, and how different our lives are. But for a moment I am right back in that moment, because I took the time to capture it. Thankful.

This post was originally published on my old blog on February 23, 2006. Today I remember this moment, but at the same time I am intentional to capture the new moments for this day.


One of my favorite times as a Mommy is bath time. I just love bathing my chubby little girl. She is so happy while getting a bath. I love the smell of a clean baby and the feel of soft satiny baby skin. I love sweet-smelling, silky baby hair that swirls around in a wispy halo on baby's head. I love the fresh miniature bottom, cleaned and ready to be diapered, the ten tiny toes, wrinkled and wiggly. I love the beads of water droplets that stick to her long, dark lashes, that give her that fresh face appearance. I love when my sweet smelling, toweled baby, curls her warm little body into mine, and nuzzles her head into my neck, cooing and blowing raspberries. I love how my little one looks in her yellow hooded ducky towel - truly a bathing beauty. I love the special bonding time we share while lotioning her little body from top to bottom - the smell- so sweet. I love when she is all dressed and is sleepy from her bath. The groggy smile, just for Mommy, melts my heart, and her droopy eyes make me smile. Dear God, thank you for these tender moments with my tiny daughter. Help me not to take these everyday miracles for granted, may I always remember bath time with my baby, and cherish each moment as a special memory to be preserved in my heart forever. . . . .I am blessed.

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.A Word of Warning.

Let our terrible, traumatic experience be a word of warning to you, my dearly beloved.

When travelling, even if you happen to be falling asleep at the wheel, and even if there is not a Starbucks for miles around, do not by any means be fooled into stopping at an aesthetically pleasing little place called Coffee Culture Cafe' for a cup of black coffee - even if the said coffee claims to be organic fair trade.



Consider yourself warned. We lived and learned. The really hard way.

As far as the rest of the trip, it pretty much looked like 12 hours of this.

My children are troopers.

Now if only we could figure out how to get everyone to sleep in one room.

.Happy New Year.

Wow. Christmas came and went. And now I sit here as the first day of this new year, 2010 yawns to a close. Time is so fleeting. The older I get, the faster it goes. I can remember how time nearly stood still for what seemed like forever when I was a child, and now that I am an adult with two children it is just whirling by. I am looking forward to what God has in store for our family in 2010. I think He has some huge plans. And I am scared. And I am excited.
I have kind of hit a dry spot with my blogging. I need to give my blog a makeover, but enjoy the Christmas music, the snow, and all, for a few more moments. {grin} Too much going on - too much living and busyness and family togetherness and stuff, but I wanted to quickly share an idea that I heard of a few months ago that I am so excited to try this new year.
I think in my last post I mentioned how I was a list maker, and I liked organizing things in my own handwriting, and how I had a deep love for pen and paper. Well, I love journaling, too, as you can probably guess. However, my journal entries seem to be getting sparser, and I really wanted to remedy that. As much as I love blogging - there is just something about writing things down in my own handwriting - not sitting and typing on a sterile keyboard.
I have lists all over in a very unorganized way in my house - a to-do list on my island, a grocery list on my fridge, a calendar with appointments on my wall, a menu by my computer, a housecleaning schedule on my fridge or in a drawer, etc. A mess of lists, a big, unorganized scatterbrained mess. And then I have my beloved journal that gets neglected lately. All of these things are essential for me. I need them, or at least it seems I do. I do operate my day much more efficiently off of a to do list, a menu, a calendar, and such. But not only is it scatterbrained and unorganized, it is not creative either.
Enter: The Homemaking Visual Journal.

This was my Christmas gift to myself, along with some felt tip pens. It is just a blank book with heavy weight pages - nothing fancy and pretty inexpensive. I glued this pocket (it came off of an old calendar) to the front.

This journal will be home to my to do list, my cleaning schedule (found on the inside of the front cover in a plastic sleeve - in case I change the schedule!) my menus, new recipes I want to try, prayer requests, praises, memorable quotes my children say, memories, photos, decorating ideas, new recipes to try, my calendar, etc.
It is perfect. It is creative, yet practical, and I am so excited about it. It currently sits on my island, and I think that will be its home. It will be handy there, for phone messages, a quick look at my day ahead, and maybe even it will catch some of Cadi's drawings.



I started my journal like I start all journals - just done more creatively - a quick overview of where I am in my life right now.



I then went on to write some of my hopes, dreams, and prayers for this new year.



Then I started right in on menu planning for this coming week and a to-do list for my weekend.



I also started filling out January's calendar.

Maybe this gives a fun idea to some other journalers out there. I am excited to see how this evolves, and I may share a few more pages here and there on my blog.
(This is not an original idea of mine, I got the concept from another woman, and as soon as I remember her website, I will share it!)

Here are a few quick photos from our Christmas break. I do not want to overwhelm this post with photos, so I only pulled a couple.



My boy {finally} took four steps! Do you know how hard it is to take a photo while helping/watching an almost 18 month old walk?! HARD.



I found Cadi like this on our bed one morning after I finished my shower. She was tuckered out from the past few days.




This was Christmas morning. Yes, my children are eating leftover cookies from "Santa's" plate. It was Christmas, after all! How cute is Scotty?! We always read the Christmas story and pray to focus on the meaning of Christmas before opening any gifts. (Cadi really was as exhausted as she looked! She went to bed too late on Christmas Eve.)



If you come to our home on most days this is how you will find my children. It's a good thing that Scotty is so laid back!



My children opening their Christmas Eve jammies.

I trust you are looking forward to the new year. Maybe this is the year Christ will return? Maybe this is the year my daughter will accept Jesus as her Savior?
What WILL 2010 hold?

.In a Better Mood.

(For some reason my page is taking forever to load. In order to hear my Christmas music while reading my blog, you have to scroll down to the bottom and allow my music player to load. Harrumph.)

I decided not to blog until I was in a better mood! Here I am. My in-laws surprised us with a beautiful artificial tree as our Christmas gift. My mom-in-law was so very sweet. She told me that she picked a tree that looked the most countryish - complete with little pine cones! I thought that was so nice of her to consider my decorating style and not just purchase any artificial tree. It actually does lend itself very nicely to my prim decor. I think the slenderness of the tree makes it the most prim looking tree I have ever had. So it's official - we have an artificial tree - and I like it! And Scotty's allergies are soooo much better - between getting rid of the live tree after 24 hours and starting him on Zyrtec - well he is just a different boy!! My tripod is still MIA, which is very, very strange. All of my photography "Stuff" is stored in one location, but I cannot find that tripod anywhere. I wonder if I left it at the last shoot. I had to take a photo of our tree to share with you, after all of my complaining about a tree, but it was not taken with a tripod, and is not a great photo. You'll get the idea, though.

Not only was I shaky taking this photo, but I also must have been at a weird angle, because our tree really is straight regardless of how it appears in the photo!



I cannot believe that it is Christmas week already! I failed miserably at not getting stressed this December and truly enjoying the days leading up to the Christmas celebration. But it is not too late to redeem this week, right?! I have much to do, but I {think} I can do it in a calm, stress-free manner. I will not be doing school with Cadi this week, so we will have our mornings open. Today's to-do list looks like this:



It helps organize my thoughts and plans when it is in writing - especially my handwriting, as opposed to typed. I have always done better writing things out. In college, I hand wrote all of my papers before typing them. There is just something about pen and paper that is so precious to me. I would struggle to live without it and without my journals. It's hard for me to think without a pen in my hand, and nearly impossible for me to articulate what I may be thinking unless paper is there to capture the thoughts. A weird idiosyncrasy, I suppose.


What does your day/week look like? How do you organize your moments, or do you just let them come? Are you purposing to remain focused on the reason for our Christmas celebration? How?

Well, I had better get off the computer and get to work. It's time to find my sweet girl and our Christmas aprons. I may be back before Christmas, and I may not. I am not going to stress over it. May you have a blessed Christmas week, remembering the Baby who was born to rescue us!!

.The Tree That Was.

Is no more.
Yup it's gone.
After less than twenty four hours Scotty developed a severe allergic reaction to the beautiful tree I gushed over last night.
I held my little guy against my chest in the childrens' bathroom as we let it fill with hot steam. I gave him a nebulizer treatment and watched him struggle to catch a breath, listened to him cough and then gag as he gasped for air. I listened to his breathing, ragged and labored, wiped his nose, kissed his hot forehead, and realized a silly Christmas tree was not worth this.
So severe were his allergies and my reaction to them that we stripped the tree of our decorations and lights and short lived memories and flung it outside as quickly as possible.
I have swept, scoured, cleaned as much of the reminder of that tree away as I can.
I am a little sad, a little blue. I didn't even get one good photo.
It's artificial from here on out, but not until next year.
We are done with trees this year.
{Bah-humbug}.

.Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree.

I had resigned myself to the fact that we were not going to able to get a tree the day after Thanksgiving, as has become a tradition. Our sweet Scotty exhibited a lot of allergy problems last Christmas due to our tree. After much researching we were told the best thing to do for him was to get a live tree for no longer than ten days.

I had resigned myself to the fact that because our tree would not be up from the day after Thanksgiving until the week after New Year's, that we would have to get a small Charlie Brown type tree. How could we justify spending $40 on a tree that would be up for only a few days?

It has not felt like Christmas in our home. I am very traditional, and having such a huge tradition "messed up" has been hard for me. Of course, a Christmas tree is not the reason for Christmas - not at all. And I know that, and I believe that, and with or without a tree I would and will celebrate my Savior's birth and His rescue plan for me. And of course, I want my precious son to be healthy, and do not want to jeopardize his health just because of my want to fill a silly tradition. But still . . . .

My sweet, sweet husband who knows me so very well, and who (I am sorry to all you other wives who think differently {wink}) is definitely by far and away the best husband on this earth, surprised me this afternoon. Just after the children had gone down for their naps, I heard the doorbell ring. When I opened the door there stood my hubby with a grin stretched across his handsome face, and a monstrous 8 foot tree in his arms!! He bought a balsam fir. I was so excited,and could not wait for the children - especially Cadi to wake up from her nap.

Cadi could smell it as soon as she got to the top of the stairs. She was so excited to see the HUGE tree taking up much of our dining room. I think she thought we were just not going to get one this year. She was a lot of fun decorating the tree with this year. Scotty woke up about half way through our decorating. He was so cute upon first seeing the tree. "Pretty, pretty tree" he kept saying.



Jim helped Scotty touch the tree. This was probably not one of our brightest moves as parents to a son highly allergic to Christmas trees. {bah}



Scotty went to bed with quite the runny nose, and a bit wheezy and raspy. We will see how this works out. He was given a dose of Zyrtec, per doctor's orders, for the first time tonight. I am hoping that once that builds up in his little body, it will help.

Jim spent a bit of time trying to set up his train under the tree. He had quite the little "helper" in Scotty! Cadi for the most part sat mesmerized on the floor beneath the tree. This is a rather technically, horrible shot, but something about it is so sweet regardless.



I cannot find my tripod. I think it must be in our van from my last shoot. Jim has the van at church. I tried to take a photo without it, but I am just not steady enough on my own. It is really hard getting a nice lit Christmas tree photo with a tripod, and without is nearly impossible for me. Any tricks that you know?? This is my only lit version until I find my tripod - I laid down under the tree and held the camera as steady as I could on my chest! {grin}
I think that my husband is so romantic for bringing this tree home to us.



And in case you are wondering, because I have not mentioned it in eons - yes, we are still doing school! {wink} A homeschooling post complete with photos {grin}, for all of those who emailed and commented questions, will be coming soon!



Hope you are having a "tree"mendous day! {giggle}