I guess what is striking me the most is that even with reducing my food choices to 7, I am still overwhelmingly, abundantly, blessed and privileged. With only 7 foods, I still receive adequate nutrition, and I have not gone to bed hungry. I am not even sure that I know what real hunger feels like.
He spoke today over Skype, in that beautiful, soft voice, with his gorgeous smile stretched across his chocolate skin.
I ate meat today! Tibs.
The excitement radiating from him was palpable, and I swallowed hard past a lump in my throat. He went on to explain how a kind foreigner had invited him out for a meal, and how he was able to fill his hungry belly for the first time in quite awhile.
In that moment the contrast between his world and mine was even more glaringly apparent. I felt sick. It's been eight days, and I have eaten meat, granted chicken, every single one of those eight days. Instead of exclaiming my thanksgiving I sigh over chicken again.
I don't know what is wrong with me. Why am I not more thankful for every single grace gift in my life? I sit here surrounded by luxury after luxury - all undeserved. I am moved to tears, and haven't the words to write all that's in my heart. And God's gracious gifts don't stop, as I type another gift is set on my counter. My husband just walked in with a gallon of cider that I will warm up and slowly savor.
But in this moment I understand - the veil is lifted for now, and I am thanking God for this cider. This gift. This undeserved, glorious blessing.
And God, thank you that I got to eat meat today!