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Saturday, February 19, 2011

.What I Wish our Churches, Families, and Friends Knew.

God has blessed us with a few amazing families who have walked beside us every step of this journey. These families have been completely invested in this process, and it has become as much their journey as it is ours. And we love that. This could have been a very lonely time in our lives without them.

These special people are already asking what we will need when we come home with Jamesy. They genuinely want to know how can they continue to be part of this story, and how can they help our family in the days and years to come. I haven't known what to say, because I have not lived this yet.

However, Dr. Karyn Purvis, who has lived this herself and with other families over and over, knows the kind of support and understanding we will need from our church, our family, and our friends. I wish for all that love us and truly want to be a part of our journey to listen and hear the wise counsel in this 30 minute audio talk here. I know I am asking a lot in having you sacrifice 30 minutes of your time, but I honestly do think this is worth it.

We are blessed by the people God has placed in our life for such a time as this.

(I am working up a very detailed post on attachment/bonding and cocooning for next week. Pray for me, as I seek to write this graciously and honestly.)


Anonymous said...

That was a great audio link Tiffany. You are so right, this is likely THE MOST important thing those in your life can do for you...try to understand, learn and listen. We didn't have anyone in our lives that had walked the adoption journey. We did a lot of reading, research, trying to prepare ourselves for what was to much as we can do that.:) When attachment/bonding wasn't easy and didn't just fall into place that was really hard for the whole family, but even more so because I felt like noboday else had educated themselves. I felt guilty for the months and months and months that we weren't present, that we camped out at home, for all the phone calls left unanswered. It took a long time for me to get past that, to say, HEY, we are doing what is best for US, for our FAMILY, for our LITTLE GIRL. So speak honestly, yes! Ask those that love you to educate themselves, really, really educate themselves. Don't, I know it's hard sometimes, give into the guilt of trying to please others all the time,their time with Jamesy will come in time. Your new precious son and your new family of 5 is what has to come first. You will rock it I'm sure!! Can't wait to see Jamesy at home and am praying non stop for you, not just on the journey to bring him home but on the journey that comes after he is home as well. From a Momma who has been there done that in regards to the sometimes long road to attachment, don't hesitate to send me a note if you ever want to "talk" or vent.
Huge Hugs,
Amy Ruston

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