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Thursday, November 11, 2010

.But What Can I Do? Part 2.

Continuing on in ideas a family or a person can do to fulfill their biblical responsibility to orphans, that does not involve adopting a child for their family....

How about supporting a family who is adopting?

We have been blessed in huge ways by families and people who have come along side us in our journey and said no, God isn't calling us to adopt at least right now, but we want to obey in another area - by supporting you and your adoption.

I didn't expect this. I didn't realize that God wanted to use other people in our journey and allow them to fulfill their responsibility by blessing us. Humbling. Very, very humbling. Especially since, at first, I didn't want the blessings. I was too proud. I have now come to understand that this, not adoption, is God's plan for some people though. This is how they can follow James 1:27, and to take that away from people would be so very wrong. Since my family has been on the receiving end of these blessings, I can share ways other people have supported us.

The obvious thing that can be done is to give financially. It doesn't have to be a lot. The very first amount we were given was $5.00, and let me tell you that knowing that $5.00 came from people who barely had $5.00 to give was huge! We were encouraged and blessed by the $5.00 in amazing ways. That $5.00 told us we were not alone, we were not entirely crazy, and that yes, people would rally around us. There is absolutely no way we could have completed this adoption without the help of God's people - the church. And that is exactly how it is supposed to be. Maybe God isn't calling you to adopt, but maybe He is calling you to invest that $5.00 that you would normally spend on your morning cup of coffee in a family from your church who is adopting. Trust me when I say that every. penny. counts. when it comes to adoption!

Prayer is absolutely huge and needed in every adoption. And while it is wonderful to pray for a family adopting, let me tell you from experience that it is the biggest encouragement when someone tells me they are praying for us. I have three prayer warriors that I can think of off the top of my head. Starting this journey, I never would have guessed that these three women would have been so influential in this process. (That is the funny thing about adoption - God doesn't use who you think He will, and does use who you don't think He will! Hmmmm..... seems as if He is teaching us something in that!) I knew through our adoption process, and still know now as we reach the finish line, that if I needed prayer for anything that I could facebook message two of them and text the other......and I did! They always responded that they were immediatley going to the throne on my behalf, and one would write me out the prayers she was praying for me at that moment. I cannot even tell you what that has meant to me, and how many times I have blubbered all over my keyboard reading the words she prayed to our heavenly Father.

Another thing is to ask for specifics that you can pray over for the family. While it is nice to know that people are praying, and that does and did encourage us, what really blessed me was when people would get specific. Get to know the families adoption process, ask questions, research so that you understand what they are talking about, and ask how you can specifically pray at that moment in time. I have been blown away when people ask educated questions regarding our process - to know someone is truly listening and truly wants to understand has been awesome. I know those that have done this for us really care, and are really petitioning God for us. It has been an amazing blessing. You will love the sweet friendship that forms from that intimacy as well!

There is a lot of paper work that goes into adoption, home studies, education courses - just lots of time. One thing we have really appreciated is people offering to watch our children for a couple of hours so that we can work on the paperwork or go to a finger printing appointment. Again, get involved with the family's process and find out how you can help. It will be a huge blessing!

Speak words of truth into an adoptive family's ear. There will be low days. There will be hard moments. I can promise that. Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit's leading, and send the family a card with Scripture verses written out or email them some encouragement. One of the biggest blessing for me was when a friend would call and say Tiffany, I know you don't want to talk, you want to hide out, but you need to talk about this. Tell me what's going on. Let me in on the process. Different people respond to stress and emotions in different ways. I withdraw, but I had this one friend that would. not. let me. She took an interest in the process, and in me and my....emotional state. {grin} She made me talk through my feelings and what was going on. Every time I got off of the phone I was encouraged to keep plugging on.

There are hundreds of way that you can assist a family who is adopting. These are just a few that have meant the most to us, but every family is different. Please feel free to share your ideas below in your comment!

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