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Sunday, May 16, 2010

.You Did it To Him.

Excuse me as I try to process and find the right words. I'm not sure if I can. My prayer is that you hear my heart, regardless of my inadequate words.

It's been one week since we have announced to the "world" our hopes and plans with our adoption. One week. In this one week, I have seen Jesus in people, unlike I ever have before.

Last Sunday evening my husband and I lay in bed. Jim was really wrestling with the enemy over finances for this adoption.

We had time-sensitive paperwork that we needed to return to our agency before we could be assigned a family coordinator and truly start our dossier. However, we could not hand in that paperwork without an accompanying check. A check for which we did not have all of the money, and we knew Jim was not getting paid for another two weeks. We had raked over our budget with a fine-tooth comb. A good portion of our monthly bills had to be paid last week. We tried to scrimp where we could - no buying groceries - we've lived out of our pantry. Absolutely no extras, but we still came up short. We also knew that once we handed that check in we also had to pay almost $200 for 8 hour online adoption classes. We were advised to get these classes behind us before the mountain of paperwork for our dossier happened.

I could tell Jim was worried and anxious and unsure. He kept going over and over our finances thinking maybe we had missed something somewhere. He checked our savings and checking accounts multiple times. The money wasn't there, but we knew this was what God had called us to. We knew that this was His timing - as crazy as it seems. We knew that even though this journey is crazy and uncomfortable that it was right.We had read countless adoption stories written by other believers, and in every single story the message was the same.

God loves adoption.

God loves His orphans.

God will move mountains for adoption and His orphans.

I took that to heart and repeated it over and over to myself and to Jim. By saying this out loud I was willing myself to believe it. And even though it has only been a week, and we are still in the early stages of our adoption process with miles to go before our baby is in our arms, God has shown Himself more than capable.

And the instrument that He has used to show us that has been you. My blogging friends. A community of women that I have {mostly} never, ever met face to face. Only a very small portion of the money we have received has come from people we know. Jim and I were able to send in our paperwork and check this week. This morning, as we were going through our excel spreadsheet, where we are keeping track of donations, we were amazed to see that God had provided exactly what we needed for both the $1125.00 check to send to our agency and the $200.00 for our classes.

Wow.

I am humbled. I am amazed. And dear friends, for you truly are just that, I am ashamed. Every time we receive another donation I say to Jim in amazement, so and so who blogs at -------------- just donated to our adoption fund. Can you believe that?! Some gave $10.00 that they could have truly used for themselves, some were led to give their tithe, and some are also on the adoption journey and still felt led to donate to us. I have cried buckets of tears over your generosity - over your sacrifices on our behalf. My cheeks are soaked and my vision is blurred as I try to type out this post. I am ashamed, because I am not sure if I would be as sensitive to God's leading in my life. Would I be willing to donate our hard earned money to people that I do not even know?? I pray that after this experience my answer will be whole-heatedly yes!! It is Jim and my prayer, that as soon as our adoption is final, we can pass this love and encouragement on and donate money to others seeking to adopt.

That's what Jesus would want.

My dear readers, you have taught me a valuable lesson this week. You have been an instrument for Jesus Christ, as you reached out to us. You have reminded me that God is capable. He is more than capable! Our next mountain of $8000.00 doesn't even make me flinch anymore. I know God is going to provide. I know He is in it.

How do I know?

Because of you. Because you were the hands and feet of Jesus this week.

Thank you. How do I find the words to thank people for having a hand in uniting our family? For wanting to see our sweet baby in our arms?

I'm not sure I'm still trying to figure that out.

Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me. ~Matthew 25:40

Ultimately I know all the glory goes to God, who has orchestrated and ordained this.

Thank you Jesus. You are my all-in-all. Worthy is Your name.

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YOU are the treasure that I seek.
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10 comments:

rameelin said...

Tiff--I am humbled by your story and by all that is happening at the hand of God! I cannot wait to see what more God is going to do in this journey. Thanks for sharing it--every step of the way. Please, Tiffany, also continue to share the struggles, pain, doubt & fear that goes along with this journey for your family. Someday you will be glad that you wrote it all out; shared it. I am so thankful that you are willing to do that now. We are praying. ♥

My Heart said...

Yay, God! He is so very good! He is all sufficient! Yay for those willing and able to bless you!

Sunnymama said...

I happen to find your blog somehow, don't even remember now. But your heart and fears and excitement was right where mine was a year ago. We just brought home our daughter from Korea. We were so scared of the financial burden of adoption but today God has provided every penny we have needed. We did not have to borrow a dime. God used my daughter and the journey to her to change me. I can't even begin to explain what God has done to my heart. When I began this journey I thought I was going to "save" a child. But God used my daughter to save me. I get so excited seeing others adopt because of how amazing and faithful God is and how I know that your life will be forever changed because of it. Congratulations for taking that leap of faith, it is the best roller coaster of your life. I will be following your journey and praying for you.

Barbie said...

Oh He is so good and will continue to shower you with His goodness. Praying blessings over you and those who have been able to bless you!

Rachel said...

This is so sweet. I can so relate and understand, because we have fundraised not only for adoption but also for ministry as church planters. It is so hard but so wonderful.

Have you reached your preorder total for tshirts?! I'll order one and send you a pic once we get it! Fun idea!

Melissa said...

This just brought me to tears! I am so excited for your family and the journey of faith that God is leading you on! I don't know if you have ever heard of the book God's Smuggler by Brother Andrew but it is an amazing story of a missionary who put his complete and total faith in God and time after time saw Him provide exactly what he needed. To the penny at times even! Good luck and I'll be praying for you all! What an inspiration you are!

Rachel said...

Oh MY GOSH Melissa I just finished that book a couple of weeks ago!!! Has totally boosted my faith!

And I came back because I somehow just realized Y.O.U.R.E. Tiffany!! I see your comments all the time and always seem to agree with you! Ha! Nice to meet you and I'll be following!

Melissa said...

Adoption has always been on the hearts of my husband and me. I've always said that there is no way we could afford it any time soon. Thank you for the reminder that anything is possible with God.

Laura said...

YES!! I love, love, loved reading this post this morning! It is so great to rejoice with you over the amazing work God is doing. I hadn't had the chance to read your blog this past weekend, so I'm catching up right now. I just wanted to tell you how much God has touched my heart with your story, Tiffany. Isn't it so crazy how God can use blogging like this? Well, it's NOT, but you know what I mean! I can totally identify with the feeling you were saying describing,"Would I give to strangers?" I know! But girl, when God IS in it, there is no stopping His mighty hand. He'll send the right people to your blog that WILL give. :-)

He has called you into this journey! He will see you through it, He WILL provide, and He can use the blogging community to rally around you with support and love. I am so excited and privileged to watch this whole beautiful experience unfold with you. My family and I are praying for you! Lots of love to you :-)

~Laura

Dave and jody said...

Wow, this is my first time here and you've already got me in tears! What an incredible and ENCOURAGING post. Can't wait to see how everything plays out. :-)

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