.Let's Be Honest.

Okay I must be honest for a moment.

I {really} have been enjoying getting acclimated to Jim's new position as a Pastor. And I am learning it is so much more than a new position, or a new ministry.

It is a way of life.

And I am loving it.

I am learning so very much. I am learning to open my home on a moment's notice. Something that I have never ever been good at. (Have I mentioned before how much I love order and routine and knowing what will happen ahead of time?! ha!) But truly God is chiseling away at me. He is working on my hospitality, my priorities, my pride, oh how He is working!

Our Pastor's wife (We have two pastors at our church - Jim is one. He is the Associate Pastor.) gave me such wise counsel shortly before Jim was hired. She told me to be ready to just let Jim go and minister. I didn't really "get it" when she told me that, but after three short weeks in this ministry I am getting it. I also realize what wisdom was in her words. She has taken me under her wings and has helped me immensely as I feel out this new path before us.

That is {part of} why I have not written any posts in a long time.

The other reason is more foolish.

Awhile back I wrote a post that I was and am very passionate about. I do not regret anything that I wrote, as I have read it and reread it. But I learned that the particular post was misunderstood and misinterpreted to mean something that I was not intending. And it kind of knocked the wind out of my sails. My husband read the post in question and supported my position 100% and did not see a problem with it. But I have just been hesitant to write anything. My skin is not thick. I do not like stirring up controversy. {bleck}

Even now I hesitate to push publish. I have stated and restated that this blog is for me, for me to cherish the moments and preserve the memories of my young family. Along the way I have gathered a handful of dear, sweet readers who amazingly God has allowed my words to encourage their hearts. It is humbling and exciting, because for as long as I could write my letters I have wanted to write and impact people. I always thought I would publish a book, and I even tried a few times. However, God has shown me the past few months that my platform with writing for now is my blog, and I love that. It just hurt to be misunderstood, but I need to get a backbone because that is part of this bit. Is it not?

Mondays are our family day now. I love that. Yesterday we drove to see Jim's parents and stopped at a few thrift stores along the way. Jim and I had a nice chance to talk during our travels. He encouraged me to keep blogging. He feels that it is an important ministry that I have. Maybe he is right. I pray God can use me despite me.

So in being honest, I had my feelings hurt. I sulked for a bit, but I am back. I'm not giving up.

Galatians 6:9
And let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.